Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    dore0021's Avatar
    dore0021 Posts: 4, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jan 10, 2013, 11:07 AM
    Boyfriend: Insecure? Dominating? Manipulating? Or is it me?
    I'm in my early 30's, I just recently got divorced, I have a 3 year old son and have started dating this man who at first swept me off my feet.
    He made me feel like I was his first priority, that I was different from all the rest. He possesses a lot of qualities I was looking for, e.g. job, good financial situation, family man etc.

    Now I'm having doubts, or have been for the last 5 months (dating 6 total). I don't know if it's just me having gotten out of a marriage and having issues to deal with, or, if this guy is actuallyl crazy!
    He calls at least 5 times a day. How are you? Where are you? What are you doing? What are you doing to do later? Talked to anyone today? (meaning any one with a penis) Do you miss me? Do you love me? Over and over again.
    He texts constantly. Throughout the day.
    He's a manager and tends to manage with a very aggressive/dominant personality.
    I hear constantly about how my choices or when I voice my feelings, how I have hurt him.
    He has a rebuttle to everything I say, that it's all my fault, but then will end the converstation with "FINE I'll do whatever you want to make you happy. I'll be the bigger man!"
    Lastly, he's been brining up moving in and that he could quit one of his jobs to spend more time together if he did. It's almost like he used the weardown method. Eventually I said okay, you can give your notice Jan 1st for your apartment. Well by the 7th I was a basket case, sick to my stomach, realizing this was WRONG. We've only been together 5 months! He reversed it but now I'm hearing constantly how he can't trust anything I say and I've hurt him so much.

    I can't constantly be reassuring me someone. It's driving me crazy.

    I do want to say that most things I've asked him to change, e.g. spend more time with me, start spending time at my house instead of always at his, tone down the aggressive attitude. Etc he has done. I appreciate them. But I'm feeling smothered.

    Is it just me? Am I not ready for a relationship? Or is this guy actually crazy?
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #2

    Jan 10, 2013, 11:21 AM
    He sounds very possessive and controlling. You have found out who he is after 6 months and you really need to walk away. I certainly would not have him living with me and my son.
    Time to call it quits. You don't sound happy at all.
    Oliver2011's Avatar
    Oliver2011 Posts: 2,606, Reputation: 746
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jan 10, 2013, 12:40 PM
    I totally agree with Homegirl. Controlling people only get worse or more crazy as time goes by. You deserve better than that. RUN!!

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

How do I get my boyfriend to be more dominating in the bedroom? [ 3 Answers ]

He is the type of guy who wants to "make love" not sex. He is very vanilla, very sweet and cuddly. I am the opposite. Don't get me wrong, vanilla is nice once in a while. But it gets boring real fast! I've asked him to be more dominating... With bondage, blindfolds, the whole shabang. He's not...

I'm an insecure boyfriend, and don't want to hurt my girlfriend. Jelous and insecure [ 17 Answers ]

Hi, thanks for coming to help out. I don't want to go on a whole large rant, but I do want to make sure that anyone reading this truly gets what I am talking about. My name is Kevin and I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for a little over a year now. I met her in High school and...

How do I deal with a boyfriend thats's very insecure? [ 4 Answers ]

I have been dating this guy for about 10 months now. I am a very independent and laid back person. He on the other hand is very insecure. Our relationship has been going really well and we rarely get into arguments. When we do argue it's because He wants me to tell him all the time that I need him...

Insecure Boyfriend Never Liked My Career [ 4 Answers ]

I use to work for a bank (7 years). My boyfriend hated the fact that I worked there because I was a manager (thinking young tellers would try something), the hours were crazy (the bank was like my 2nd home), and I complained about the job a lot (he would get frustrated AT ME when I was venting...


View more questions Search