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    Unbrokensmile's Avatar
    Unbrokensmile Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Dec 14, 2012, 05:59 PM
    Why is my ex boyfriend mad at me over this?
    My ex now, was mad at me earlier this week because my other ex, whom I was with, before I was with this previous one, text me and I didn't know he would, it was really unexpected. What I don't understand is why my ex now, was mad at me, it's not like I knew my other ex was going to talk to me. My ex now, has a girlfriend anyway and I don't get why it matters so much to him that my other ex spoke to me. We talked and he apologised for getting mad but now he's gone off on one again and I don't know what I have done for him to be mad and stop talking to me.
    I'm thinking I should stop talking to him for a while to give him space and let him talk to me in his own time. I've also asked my very close friend if she could talk to him for me as I know he won't tell me if I ask him because he never does.
    What does it mean when your ex boyfriend is mad at you because your other ex boyfriend spoke to you unexpectedly?
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,691, Reputation: 1547
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    #2

    Dec 14, 2012, 06:15 PM
    Why do you even care? He's your ex so forget about him if he's going to be childish. It shouldn't even matter to you.
    Unbrokensmile's Avatar
    Unbrokensmile Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Dec 15, 2012, 10:20 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by odinn7 View Post
    Why do you even care? he's your ex so forget about him if he's going to be childish. It shouldn't even matter to you.
    Unfortunately it matters to me, I don't know why but it does. When I found out the reason why he was mad at me the first thing I thought was that he's being childish about it. I just don't get why it matters so much to him that my other ex spoke to me
    And I want to know why. The other thing I don't get is why he kept telling me he wants me and loves me. When he has a girlfriend anyway and seems to be happy with her.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Dec 15, 2012, 11:21 AM
    He does it because he can because he knows you won't do anything to stop him from this childish controlling behavior. The real question is why and the answer is obvious, you like his attention and jealousy.

    Why else would you be curious as to his motives and go so far as bring in a friend to see if he still has those feelings for you whether you won't them or not. You both have others but keep the old attachments alive behind their backs, so you must be very young, or very inexperienced in seeing the true motives behind your actions and his, and the proper good behavior you both should follow.

    If he was indeed an ex, and you had moved on, then you wouldn't be curious, nor would you be acting on that curiosity. Bet you were not so curious over the unexpected contact by an even older ex, so ask yourself why the exes reaction has so much meaning for you.

    Only then can you know your own motives behind YOUR curiosity and whether those feelings should be acted on or NOT.
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,691, Reputation: 1547
    Entomology Expert
     
    #5

    Dec 15, 2012, 11:33 AM
    Good answer Tal... well said.
    Unbrokensmile's Avatar
    Unbrokensmile Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Dec 15, 2012, 12:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    He does it because he can because he knows you won't do anything to stop him from this childish controlling behavior. The real question is why and the answer is obvious, you like his attention and jealousy.

    Why else would you be curious as to his motives and go so far as bring in a friend to see if he still has those feelings for you whether you won't them or not. You both have others but keep the old attachments alive behind their backs, so you must be very young, or very inexperienced in seeing the true motives behind your actions and his, and the proper good behavior you both should follow.

    If he was indeed an ex, and you had moved on, then you wouldn't be curious, nor would you be acting on that curiosity. Bet you were not so curious over the unexpected contact by an even older ex, so ask yourself why the exes reaction has so much meaning for you.

    Only then can you know your own motives behind YOUR curiosity and whether those feelings should be acted on or NOT.

    I asked a friend to talk to him because I don't know why he just stopped talking to me and didn't say why. If I ask him why he will not tell me, he does not say when I ask him but he most likely would if my friend spoke to him and asked him. I already said this.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Dec 15, 2012, 12:57 PM
    How old are you both as asking a friend to talk to a guy/ex for you is grade school stuff.
    Unbrokensmile's Avatar
    Unbrokensmile Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Dec 15, 2012, 01:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    How old are you both as asking a friend to talk to a guy/ex for you is grade school stuff.
    We are both 19.

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