[bunnylover11]

Me and my friend where supposed to go swimming but it got cancelled then all the other ideas we had my mum didn't approve so what can we do and my mum doesn't want her to come over to the house.

HELP

[dontknownuthin]

How old are you? What were the other ideas your mother disapproved of? Did she say why she disapproves of your ideas?

My son is almost grown up now so it's been a few years since I've been really involved in his social plans very much, except setting curfews and deciding if he can have the car. When he was younger though, I had reasons for saying "no" when that was my answer but I wanted to say "yes" to his requests as often as I could. I think most parents do.

Sometimes we were too busy to add more plans to our day. At these times, nothing my son and his friends planned would have fit into the day and he just wasn't available to play. Sometimes I didn't want kids in the house because the house was not cleaned to my standards, and/or the kids were not respecting the house when they were there. My son learned in time that before he asked to have friends over, he better make sure his chores were done and the house was picked up to my standards, or the answer was going to be "no". He also learned that he and his friends had to respect the rules of the house or they weren't going to be playing in the house very often. They were banished outside for weeks after one day when they were repeatedly slamming doors and running in the house after I asked them not to. I had a point to make to all of them about respecting the reasonable requests of adults!

Sometimes he just was asking me to do something I didn't want to do, like driving him to a mall when I was sick of being in the car, or giving him money to do an activity when he could have played a game or goofed off in the yard for free. My son went through a phase where everything he and his friends wanted to do required money, and as a matter of principal and finances, I often said "no" because it's a very bad habit to only pursue interests that cost money.

Maybe your mom would be OK with you having a guest if you play outside, or go to a park (if you're old enough). Maybe you can go to your friend's house. Perhaps you can make a trade with your mom like, "if I clean the bathrooms and vacuum first, may I have Mary over to watch movies for three hours this afternoon?" This often worked for me when I was a kid. I can tell you, when I cleaned the house without being asked - I could have just about whatever I wanted within reason!

Good luck to you and your friend - I hope you get to do something fun.

[bunnylover11]

I'm 12 and ice skating - no cause you might get hurt movies - you already saw one go to her house - disrespectful come over - house is a mess