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    Pagham15's Avatar
    Pagham15 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 25, 2012, 09:23 AM
    Girlfriend is 14 I am 17 her mom doesn't want me around her
    Me and my girl friend have been together 2 months and have connected perfect!

    She is 14 I am 17 I originally thought she was 16 and when I found out the age it was to late we had fallen for each other already, I love this girl more than anything and really want to be with her but she tried telling her mum about us and her mum has been texting me saying to back off and that she will... 1- tell the police to take her off me if seen with me 2- Get me put on a sex offenders list 3- stop her daughter from seeing me and basically the threats keep coming, I have ask to meet in person over a coffee/ Tea and talk about it but she never texts back answering the question.

    I have helped my girl out in so many bad situations she has been in that her mother is oblivious to and can't know about and basically I just need help on what to do... Please only helpful answers or people in a simlar situation write as this really is breaking me, Thank you
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #2

    Sep 25, 2012, 09:40 AM
    Too bad.

    She's a minor and lives under her mothers roof, so she lives by her mothers rules. Next year you're going to be an adult so her mother can go after you with the law and I think she will. I know my 14 year old daughter would be nowheres near a 17 year old.
    Pagham15's Avatar
    Pagham15 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Sep 25, 2012, 10:46 AM
    What about if your daughter really liked the boy and had a great connection with him? Would you really want to break that?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #4

    Sep 25, 2012, 10:49 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Pagham15 View Post
    What about if your daughter really liked the boy and had a great connection with him? would you really want to break that?
    I wouldn't care about that at all. As far as I am concerned, my daughter is underage, a minor, and I wouldn't want her to have my okay on a relationship that offered an opportunity for sexual activity.
    aliseaodo's Avatar
    aliseaodo Posts: 1,671, Reputation: 259
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    #5

    Sep 25, 2012, 10:55 AM
    If it is such a truly good connection, and really is meant to be, and you honestly love her, you should have no problem waiting for her. What a great way to prove to the mother that you're really a good guy!
    Pagham15's Avatar
    Pagham15 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Sep 25, 2012, 11:39 AM
    Yes I know but I'm scared because she has a lot of problems with bullys and things when she's single to the point where she has once overdosed, and I'm scared that without me for a year and 6 months something like that will happen again :/
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #7

    Sep 25, 2012, 11:49 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Pagham15 View Post
    Yes i know but im scared because she has a lot of problems with bullys and things when shes single to the point where she has once overdosed, and im scared that without me for a year and 6 months something like that will happen again :/
    She needs to tell all this to the adults in her life. If she does, she will be fine "without" you.
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #8

    Sep 25, 2012, 11:51 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Pagham15 View Post
    Yes i know but im scared because she has a lot of problems with bullys and things when shes single to the point where she has once overdosed, and im scared that without me for a year and 6 months something like that will happen again :/
    1 year and 6 months? You'd be waiting 3 years until she's 18, an adult, before you'll be able to be with her without her mothers permission.


    It looks like she needs to learn to go to her parents for help and guidance instead of running to you. Stop giving her excuses to hide things from her parents, you're doing more harm than good and you don't even realize it.
    LadySam's Avatar
    LadySam Posts: 1,589, Reputation: 322
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    #9

    Sep 25, 2012, 11:52 AM
    Does her mom know about the overdosing?
    And no I am not condoning your behavior, but I think she needs some help with her emotional problems.
    Pagham15's Avatar
    Pagham15 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Sep 25, 2012, 12:03 PM
    The all know and no her mum has always said 16 you can do what you want so its only that long but yes she has had help since then
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #11

    Sep 25, 2012, 12:07 PM
    You need to leave this girl alone. Her depending on you instead of her parents is misplaced and your seeing her against her parents wishes is wrong.
    There is no way I would allow a 17 year old around my 14 year old daughter.
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #12

    Sep 25, 2012, 12:12 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Pagham15 View Post
    The all know and no her mum has always said 16 you can do what you want so its only that long but yes she has had help since then
    If the connection is a good as you say, 1 year and 6 month is not a long wait at all.
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,591, Reputation: 2941
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    #13

    Sep 25, 2012, 02:00 PM
    The fact that her mother won't respond to you is a very good sign that she means what she says about the police.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #14

    Sep 25, 2012, 02:04 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by joypulv View Post
    The fact that her mother won't respond to you is a very good sign that she means what she says about the police.
    And I don't blame her.

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