[kathrynd1551]

I am a disabled 61 yr old female and live alone. I raised 3 kids on my own. Neighbor is always asking me to babysit for her 3 grandkids. She has custody of them as her daughter is in prison. I am feeling overwhelmed. Also, she comes over at least 3 times a day. I have to live next to her and see her everyday - what can I do? Getting very stressed.

[smoothy]

Thell your neighbor NO... it really is that simple. If you can't say no... then you will get taken advantage of.


Or demand a price of $100 per kid per day, cash in advance for your babysitting services.

[joypulv]

Be honest: I just can't do it anymore, it's too much, I need to be alone, and can't have you over, sorry.
If you can't be honest, then make up a good excuse!
And lock your door and don't answer it.
Excuses:
Pain and not able to sleep so you have to take naps here and there.
Doctors orders to cut down on stress.
I'm sure you can think of some - you are disabled, use it.
Stop being so nice.

[gmaof04]

You will only be the doormat if you let people walk on you. No means no... Just tell her you do not wish to watch children. It's that easy. The longer you wait to tell her, the harder it will be. Stop this now.

[panda2913]

I know its hard to say no, but that's what you're thinking inside, right? Just tell her no... but in a nicer way. If she doesn't know you're disabled, tell her, and if she does, bring up the subject and tell her that's why you can't babysit. There might be another reason, but this reason is just the simplest, because she most likely won't question you.

Hope I helped!

[Fr_Chuck]

Just say no, and no and no, she will get the idea

[dontknownuthin]

I agree with the others - I think you feel badly for this lady but she needs to find another resource. I would probably not offer an excuse or reason because people who take advantage are often also the same kind of people who think it's their place to evaluate the reasoning of the people who tell them "no".

It will be uncomfortable but only because she's trying to make you uncomfortable so that you say yes. It's a manipulation. Just tell her, "I just wanted to give you a heads up so you can make other arrangements - I'm not able to babysit any more."

If she asks why just tell her, "well, I'm on disability you know - that's really all I'm comfortable saying about it".

When she inevitably comes over and pleads in an emergency, you have to stand your ground, "Well, you've put me in a difficult position - I've told you I can't so I'd rather you please not ask. The answer has to be no." When she comes over and is not welcome, tell her it's "not a good time" and do not open the door wide enough for her to come in. If the kids come over and you don't want them at the house, send them home.