[SandiJane]

My ex-boyfriend of several months sent me a break up e-mail 4 weeks ago suddenly and without explanation. It was totally out of the blue and unexpected. He emailed me one day about our plans for getting together and 24 hours later he sent me the breakup e-mail! The email was 2 paragraphs long, expressing regret but providing no explanation. He just said things like it was nothing I had done and that he'd miss me. I went into "no contact" mode and deleted him and his contact information from my computer, phone, etc. Neither of us contacted the other for 4 weeks. Some of our plans were for my birthday 4 days ago (approx 4 weeks after the breakup email). So on my birthday 4 days he sent me a Happy Birthday e-mail ago out of the blue. The first paragraph extended warm birthday wishes as if nothing had happened. The second paragraph explained that the reason he broke up with me was because his doctor convinced him that he had a terrible disease and he knew I wouldn't be interested in sick guy. However, his tests have now come back negative, so it looks like he's going to live. He said he was just explaining the reason for the "sudden change." I didn't respond. The next day, 3 days ago, he sent another e-mail asking how I'm doing and framing a political topic in a flirty manner. He then said he'd reserve his opinion on the subject until he hears "what I have to say (or write) - or both " I haven't responded. I don't know whether I'd want to reconcile or not, but I'd certainly like to know more than he's telling me. Should I respond? If so, how and when? If I am to respond, I'd like to do so before he quits contacting me so that I’m continuing the conversation rather than contacting him out of the blue. What should I do or not do? What should I say or not say? Thanks!

[santhalus]

Maybe you should meet up with him at least once and see if the guy is really sincere or not. Let him explain to you in person why he broke up with you, so you'll know if he genuinely means it or not.. and if he does seem sincere, just take it slow with him to see if he's a sneaky boy or not. If he's a consistent guy, usually it means he's not shady :)

[C0bra_M3nace]

I've seen the "sick" card pulled far too many times. That excuse is a load of BS. I think if you loved someone they'd be the first person you'd want to tell! Even if it was true, the fact that he wouldn't tell you raises a huge red flag on it's own, but that's a different topic.

Don't be naïve and fall for this, he just wants his cake and eat it too.