[jrob24]

So I've been talking to this guy that I've known for a couple years now and have been flirtacious with in the past. We are both physically interested in each other, and I continuously invite him to hang out or go to outings. It seems like every time I do he says that he's down to go and we make plans foe it to happen, but then something comes up. I'm the only one who extends invitations or initiates conversation and I feel like the only time he's made an effort was when -after a night of drinking- we ended up hooking up. He says he enjoyed himself and I'm confident in my abilities I guess you could say, but then I keep made an effort to plan times to hang out or go to a concert or party and he said yes, but backed out again. I'm just wondering if I shouldnt't waste my time or if I am just being paranoid? It's all so confusing, I feel like I keep expecting too much of people. No one ever wants to make an effort outside their immediate satisfaction.

[joypulv]

Sure, it's possible to try too hard, and how many times do you try before you should give up? I'd say a magic number is 3. It sounds like he likes you well enough, just not enough to get serious. It may just be he's looking for someone a little different. Who knows what makes your heart beat a little faster, and not just out of sexual attraction.
As for expecting too much from people in general, you don't say a lot about yourself, so it's just a guess: maybe you need to get past the fun and flirtatious stuff a little more before getting intimate? Get to know them on a more personal level, hopes and dreams and childhoods and likes and dislikes - all the stuff that never changes from one generation to the next.