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Wondergirl · Jul 13, 2012, 12:24 PM

But that doesn't prevent someone from falling hopelessly in love with you, and then you will break her heart. Note all the "I love him and want him to love me too" and "I want to convince my parents for a love marriage" and "we are from different castes but I love him" threads on this site.

tickle · Jul 13, 2012, 12:30 PM

Originally Posted by C0bra_M3nace

Seems to me like he wants a virgin, is that the case? Is that why you hid it from him. It would have hurt a lot less if you told him much earlier, or would that have pushed him away?

Seems to me like this whole relationship is bent on this lie. How many more lies are there?

Totally a good question dear CObra? How astute you are.

Iqbal Khan · Jul 13, 2012, 12:43 PM

@wonder girl - I am going off from this site with a last reply (because you care to ask and answer my questions, I am replying)

The people you are talking maybe are from north india(India is a big country) - In south India there are only 2 options - You either leave your parents, run away from home and marry the person you love (but don't expect your parents to accept your marriage for like 10-12 years, after 12 years they MAY forgive you) or you marry the person your parents choice and stay in a life long relationship (Even if you don't like you partner) The young women you are talking about know better about that and would never see me as a potential partner (therby never developing any feelings towards me) at the very best we can be good friends even after her marriage and my marriage and her family and my family and we would eventually become family friends. Those who think otherwise will be posting questions like you said, because there's hardly a way out

Wondergirl · Jul 13, 2012, 12:56 PM

Thank you for the reply. I worked for years with three women born in India and from Kashmir, Delihi, and Goa. What you say is mostly true, but the times, they are a-changin' even in southern India. With modern conveniences such as tvs and cell phones and computers, the traditional ways no longer are good for the younger generation.

JudyKayTee · Jul 13, 2012, 01:35 PM

I'd still like to know how filing a false rape charge to teach someone a lesson is justifiable. That's all I want to know -

As far as the rest of this the story changes as people chime in.

Alty · Jul 13, 2012, 01:43 PM

Great info on Asia, but did we forget that this thread isn't about lqbal Khan? He does have his own thread, perhaps it would be better to discuss his issues there.

To uuuu. Can I ask why it's important for you to be a virgin on your wedding night? I do know that in some parts of India a girl can be killed for not being a virgin on her wedding night. Are you facing that sort of predicament, or are you just worried about telling the truth to your future husband?

JudyKayTee · Jul 13, 2012, 01:46 PM

Originally Posted by Alty

Great info on Asia, but did we forget that this thread isn't about lqbal Khan? He does have his own thread, perhaps it would be better to discuss his issues there.

To uuuu. Can I ask why it's important for you to be a virgin on your wedding night? I do know that in some parts of India a girl can be killed for not being a virgin on her wedding night. Are you facing that sort of predicament, or are you just worried about telling the truth to your future husband?

OP was asked - her response was: "this my fixed by elders i can't hurt them......india ...every one happy ....i am confused ....i am cheated by guy....."

I have no idea what this means.

Alty, I don't know that this is off track. "Iqbal" recommends a false rape charge. I think that's bad advice. Maybe that's all that's left to be said BUT both the OP and Iqbal appear to be in India, so one of them must have an idea why this is a good idea - or not.

Alty · Jul 13, 2012, 02:00 PM

I don't know of any country where filing false rape charges is legal, or moral for that matter.

It would be nice to know why Iqbal thought this was a good suggestion.

Iqbal Khan · Jul 13, 2012, 02:04 PM

I do not recommend filing a real rape charges - I feel that he should be punished for cheating a girl. My advice would be to marry the guy who you were with and leave the to be husband because the poor guy thinks you are a virgin. I have seen many movies, there is a chance that this First guy would come back after you have been married for some years and blackmail you that he would tell her hubby about her past relationship with him, these things does happens in reality. So beware. I hope you do realize that marriage is a whole life commitment and starting this bond with a lie is not the best thing to do. I hope you would find and solution that you won't regret later on.

tickle · Jul 13, 2012, 02:13 PM

I have no idea what is going on with this thread, Alty. I thought it was about a man not wanting to admit to being a virgin. Now we are talking about rape... sorry my IPad isn't as quick on the uptake and I am on vacation on my sundeck with a Cesar... burp. . sorry excuse me ! The drink not a man

Alty · Jul 13, 2012, 02:19 PM

Originally Posted by tickle

I have no idea what is going on with this thread, Alty. I thought it was about a man not wanting to admit to being a virgin. Now we are talking about rape.....sorry my IPad isn't as quick on the uptake and I am on vacation on my sundeck with a Cesar...burp. .sorry excuse me ! The drink not a man

Now I'm even more confused. If the OP is a man then it's easy to hide not being a virgin, just act like you have no clue what you're doing. ;)

Maybe you should get me a chair, and a cesar would be nice too. Also not the man. ;)

JudyKayTee · Jul 13, 2012, 02:31 PM

Originally Posted by Alty

I don't know of any country where filing false rape charges is legal, or moral for that matter.

It would be nice to know why Iqbal thought this was a good suggestion.

Don't mean to turn this into a conversation but "Iqbal" turned this into a "you people," moral, take the high ground speech right after he suggested trumped up charges.

I'd be curious to know where this is accepted but, alas, I'm sure I'll never know.

Wondergirl · Jul 13, 2012, 02:33 PM

He mentioned somewhere along the line that he is in southern India.

Enigma1999 · Jul 13, 2012, 07:51 PM

There are hookers in India?

... cool.

JudyKayTee · Jul 14, 2012, 05:05 AM

Originally Posted by Enigma1999

There are hookers in India?

.....cool.

And so the thread ends on a happy note.

Laughing - priceless!

(Apparently the hooker career is short because if a person actually has sex with "one" he has to marry her, thus ending her career.)

Alty · Jul 15, 2012, 04:15 PM

Enigma, that post deserves 20 greenies! :)

I wish Istanbull (wait, that wasn't his name) Iqual? Oi! Iqbal? Whatever his name is. I wish he'd come back and explain how there are hookers when it seems that no one has sex before marriage, and if they do they have to marry that person. Prostitution doesn't seem like a good career choice in India, unless you want to hook yourself a husband. :)