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Ravalos3260 · Apr 23, 2012, 02:02 PM

So my parents are separated. This is because my dad is a cheater. A long time ago he was secretly with some lady and had a little boy with him. My mom confronted that woman, left my dad, but them got back with him because he begged her (and she probably still liked him). Later on, he cheated AGAIN and went with some other lady that I, myself, knew from parties she used to invite our family to. She knew my dad was married and they now have 2 kids and are still together, but my mom isn't with him anymore. My little brother and sister now live with my mom. I dislike my dad because obviously he mistreats women, is a cheater, and was anger issues. I pretty much hate him because the sight of his cheating face disgusts me. Just yesterday I saw my mom do something to my dad (giving a bj) in the kitchen! I was grossed out by both of them. I feel like I hate BOTH of them now! Not only is my dad taking advantage of my mom but my mom is even degrading herself and setting off a bad example for her kids. Shoul I confront my parents? IDK I'm kind of scared though. I just want to live with another family right now. I can't be living around two wh0res.

JudyKayTee · Apr 23, 2012, 02:19 PM

How old are you? It's not an unkind question - it matters.

I question your parents' individual and joint decisions but this is their relationship, not yours. I realize how painful and traumatic this must be for you and that they are dragging into their problems.

I am concerned about the level of your anger (you hate him, his face disgusts you, they are both whores). You need to speak to someone about what you have witnessed and how you feel. You are certainly more than entitled to be angry and upset at both of them but your anger is apparently hurting you. You sound responsible and have a younger brother and sister to worry about. You need to stay strong.

What is your mother thinking? I have no idea and, yes, your father is certainly taking advantage of her. I'd certainly be grossed out, too.

Whatever they choose to do it should be behind closed doors - everyone is going to agree on that.

Is there someone you can talk to, a clergyperson, someone at school, a Physician, a relative (perhaps your mother's relative)?

Living with another famiy is not an option unless your parents consent, and I don't think that is going to happen.

Ravalos3260 · Apr 23, 2012, 02:42 PM

I'm 14, and excuse my bad grammar but I was in a rush.
I have a counselor but I HATE telling her my most secret thoughts, actions, or sights because she'd probably react badly and that embarrasses me >.<

Fr_Chuck · Apr 23, 2012, 03:02 PM

Did you come in the house at a time you normally would be gone ?

Parents have sex, and BJ are common and you don't know what was going on.
Men cheat, sometimes women cheat and often they get back together. The issue with hating, is that he may be liiving back in the house next month

The issue in break ups is that you need to try and really stay out of it, and not hate either one of them for things that happen

Wondergirl · Apr 23, 2012, 03:10 PM

Originally Posted by Ravalos3260

I'm 14, and excuse my bad grammar but I was in a rush.
I have a counselor but I HATE telling her my most secret thoughts, actions, or sights because she'd probably react badly and that embarrasses me >.<

Counselors have heard EVERYthing -- trust me on that, so your counselor won't react badly and would be proud of you for letting go of this and talking about it. (Pssst, counselors are supposed to hear our secret thoughts and help us deal with them.)

JudyKayTee · Apr 23, 2012, 04:33 PM

Originally Posted by Ravalos3260

I'm 14, and excuse my bad grammar but I was in a rush.
I have a counselor but I HATE telling her my most secret thoughts, actions, or sights because she'd probably react badly and that embarrasses me >.<

No problem - I realized you were upset.

Wondergirl - and this is no secret - IS a counsellor and, yes, she's heard it all. I'm concerned that you not allow your parents' relationship scar you in the future.

You need to speak to someone, embarrassing or not!

You don't need me to tell you this but you're impressive for a 14 year old. People post ranting, impossible to follow questions and they're adults (supposedly).

Let us know how this works out.

Wondergirl · Apr 23, 2012, 04:54 PM

Not only have counselors heard it all, but they don't blab about it to anyone else. It's between you and the counselor The counselor's main job is not to hope to hear lot of kinky stuff from clients or to embarrass them for forcing them to talk about stuff, but to help them get through a bad time and then find ways to heal.

boiled eggs · Apr 23, 2012, 04:58 PM

You should tell them that you feel bad