[jadedjade]

Hey everyone,
I know there has been quite of a few of these same questions but I'd be happy for some new answers :)
I'm 21 and have been with my amazing boyfriend for a little over a year.
I'm really comfortable with him and talking about everything, including sex (except unfortunately when we're actually having sex).
The problem is that I'm not a very dominant person, in every aspect of my life, and it REALLY shows when we're having sex. When he asks what I would like him to do to me I freeze up and my brain stops functioning and I can't answer him. See for me during sex even saying that something feels good is a HUGE step cause I'm just so annoying shy!
So does anyone, anywhere, have a fail-safe anti-shy method? Even some sexy phrases that boyfriends and hubbys find irresistible? Or maybe even some song suggestions that make you feel incredibly sexy and ready for action!

Thanks for any help, much appreciated!

[JudyKayTee]

I would never do or say anything which was not spontaneous, which is not comfortable for me.

I don't know that there are sexy, fail safe phrases or methods that boyfriends and husbands find irresistible. What turns one person on turns another person off.

Songs to prepare you for sex? Not that I can think of.

Have you tried sitting down with him when you're not having sex and asking him what he would like to hear? With some men it's all about their size - length, girth. Maybe that's what he wants to hear.

Ask him.

[Wondergirl]

Some people like to talk during sex, and others don't. Some like music playing in the background; others don't because it messes up their concentration. Some like sex for hours at a time with naps mixed with multiple encounters; others like it for maybe ten minutes and then want to hit the shower and get on with life.

It sounds like he's a talker and you're not. (I don't think "shyness" has much to do with it unless you don't want to use the particular words he wants to hear.)

Like Judy said, find a quiet time and talk with him about it. Role play. Pretend to be him and he you. Let him say the words to you that would enrapture and thrill him.

[Fr_Chuck]

If he is asking you how to make it feel better, perhaps where to put his hands or somewhat, it would help to really try. But afterwards, tell him more what is better.