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    Heartbroken17's Avatar
    Heartbroken17 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 18, 2012, 09:59 PM
    Lost feelings?
    My girlfriend and I have known each other our whole lives, we have gone to the same church since we were born and have always been good friends. I'm 17 and she is 15. We started talking and becoming more than friends 6 months ago, but officially have been dating for almost 3 months. I care for her and like her a lot. But two days ago she told me that her feelings for me just stopped and she doesn't like me like that anymore, and that she doesn't want a boyfriend. I took our break up very badly, I am still heartbroken and miss her so much. I am very confused and want to get back together with her, but I don't know how because she said that she just wants to be friends from here on out. But I don't want to have a different girlfriend or want to be just friends with her. What do I do?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Jan 19, 2012, 06:53 AM
    You accept that her feelings changed, and recognize that its normal. You may have been great friends before, but the romance didn't work, for her any way.

    Go back to what you were doing before guy, and try to piece your heart back together, heal, and move on. Leave her alone until you can accept it, and you will in time, and keep your dignity, and self respect.

    Break ups suck, but we survive them, and do better.
    PunkkBarbiee's Avatar
    PunkkBarbiee Posts: 15, Reputation: 4
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    #3

    Jan 19, 2012, 08:38 AM
    Let me start by saying that I am so sorry for your recent breakup. Breaking up with someone whom you have known and loved your whole life hurts a lot --I would know. But sometimes, things like this happen. You want someone when you don't have them and as soon as you get them, you don't want 'em. That's probably what your ex-girlfriend experienced. What you should do is sit down and talk to her and suggest that, despite everything you have been through, you guys should still be friends. Y'all shouldn't let a relationship ruin a lifetime friendship. It's going to hurt, but you need to let her go. Who knows, maybe with a little time and space, she will clear up her mind and want to get together again. You can do this because time can heal anything. Don't pressure her into being in a relationship again because it will only make things worse. Instead, be the guy that was once her best friend.

    Xoxo.
    PunkkBarbiee.
    Heartbroken17's Avatar
    Heartbroken17 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Jan 20, 2012, 10:28 PM
    Will her feelings for me ever come back? If so, how long does it normally take? I am still hurting and miss her so much still, I still haven't gotten any better..
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    Jan 20, 2012, 10:38 PM
    Sometimes they do, but mostly they don't, and since no one can know for sure, its important that you get your own life in order without her. Hey its really hard on the emotions, but its for the best in the long run. Emotional healing requires acceptance, and will help you plan for the worst, that she won't come back, while you are hoping for the best.

    Sorry, but there are no sacred rules of relationships after they fail, or magical ways to fix them. So you just have to work through it and get healthy, until the hurt, and disappointment is behind you.

    Its probably going to be a while before the shock wears off.
    PunkkBarbiee's Avatar
    PunkkBarbiee Posts: 15, Reputation: 4
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    #6

    Jan 23, 2012, 11:01 AM
    There is a 50-50 chance that her feelings for you will come back. Don't get your hopes up too high though because then you're just gonna' fall flat on your face. Give her some time. And remember; keep that friendship going!

    Xoxo.
    PunkkBarbiee.
    Heartbroken17's Avatar
    Heartbroken17 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Feb 9, 2012, 05:59 PM
    Why do girls feelings just go away? Even when we both liked each other a lot! And I know there isn't another guy, her feelings for me just went away. And she does not know why they did. And she doesn't want to be boyfriend and girlfriend with me anymore. Why is that?
    PunkkBarbiee's Avatar
    PunkkBarbiee Posts: 15, Reputation: 4
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    #8

    Feb 9, 2012, 06:07 PM
    Because we wanted that thing so much and we would do anything to have that thing, then we realized that once we DO have it, we're all like, "Hey, this isn't as good as I thought it would be .. " and our feelings change. Guys experience this, too. She probably got over you or isn't ready right now. I'm sorry that things are like this.

    Xoxo.
    PunkkBarbiee.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #9

    Feb 9, 2012, 08:13 PM
    I use to ask the very same question my friend. Until I went through through experience of my own feelings changing, and wanting out of the relationship. I don't know which is worse to be honest, getting dumped, or dumping someone.
    Heartbroken17's Avatar
    Heartbroken17 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Feb 10, 2012, 11:14 PM
    Ok, so it will be a month since the break up, on Monday. And I still have huge feelings for her. She is still deep in my heart. And I want to get back together with her so bad. What should I do to get her back, or to get her to get the feelings she once had for me again?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #11

    Feb 10, 2012, 11:57 PM
    For your own sake, keep finding other things to do, but don't contact her. At all!! Hard as it is, don't act on those huge feelings.

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