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Jackets67 · Jan 8, 2012, 02:07 AM

Ok me and my girlfriend are both juniors in high school. She is moving in a month to a different state, once there her father wants her to stop talking to me completely. Her solution to the problem is that I should get her pregnant then her father has to allow me to talk to her. I am positive that I am in love with her and that she is with me, we have been dating for almost two years, but I'm scared and worried about the conseqences about her getting pregnant. If you have any advice it would be gratefully appreciated because I don't want to lose her, but I'm not sure I'm even close to ready to being a dad. Thanks for the help in advance

talaniman · Jan 8, 2012, 06:08 PM

Under NO circumstances do you want to get her pregnant. THATS AN INSANE PLAN!!!!

ScottGem · Jan 8, 2012, 06:14 PM

If you are juniors you are 16-17, right? That means you are not far from 18. Once you are both 18, her father's prohibitions don't matter.

But until then the father has control and to interfere with his wishes could get you in legal trouble.

Getting her pregnant is a dumb idea. Neither of you are prepared for a child.

Jackets67 · Jan 8, 2012, 09:32 PM

That's what I told her that getting her pregnant was a stupid idea, and we are both 16 we turn 18 in may next year. So I guess I can talk to her about waiting on that, but I'm still not sure what to do about them moving I really don't want to see her leave but I feel like I have no choice in the matter. But I did fail to mention this in the original question that if me and her can get her aunt to agree with it, her parents have said that she can stay in town which would solve the problem of getting around her dad but her aunt hates me and if she does live there I will never get to spend any time with her. I really don't know why but all her family members besides her mom that I've met don't like me. It's kind of annoying.

Thanks for the help you guys

ScottGem · Jan 9, 2012, 04:18 AM

Originally Posted by Jackets67

I really don't know why but all her family members besides her mom that I've met don't like me. It's kind of annoying.

You really don't have a choice here. Until she's 18 you both have to go with her parent's edicts.

But I think you need to work on understanding the why. Ask her father if you can have a private talk, or even better, ask him out to dinner. Ask him to explain what he has against your relationship with his daughter? Maybe if you understand the issue you can do something about it.

Jackets67 · Jan 9, 2012, 03:02 PM

I have tried that before, he says the reason he is so against it is because he doesn't think I'm good enough for her. Honestly I don't care what her dad says we love each other so he doesn't have a say after high school

ScottGem · Jan 9, 2012, 03:54 PM

Well he has a say. He will always be her father and coming between your partner and their family is not a good start to a relationship. But legally, he can't do anything once you are both adults.

Well many fathers don't think anyone is good enough for their little girls. But there has to be something more than that. Do you get lower grades than her? Come from a poorer family? Have shady friends? I just think there is more to this.

Jackets67 · Jan 9, 2012, 07:47 PM

I go to what is considered the getto high school in Louisville but it's not an are grades are about The same and I don't think that my family is poorer then hers

mmresd · Jan 9, 2012, 07:57 PM

Sounds like you too are too immature to have a serious relationship. To think that taking over the responsibility of a child as a SOLUTION is the worse idea both of you two could have come up with. Her father wants one things, she wants another, let her work things out with her father, be patient and see what she wants to do. Do NOT get her pregnant, if this works out it will do so itself no need to involve a baby in your life before you can maintain a family. Think of school, not so much in a future long distance relationship. Plus, the father wants you out of her life already, how do you think he is going to feel after you make his daughter pregnant, not only will you be forced to stay away, but will be forced to pay child support for the next 18 years of your life. No fun in that.

Jackets67 · Jan 9, 2012, 08:16 PM

That's what I've been telling her since she came up with this idea. I posted this on here so she can see other peoples opinions, I know I'm not ready to be a father, not to mention the fact that when I go to college I'm going to be playing football so I will have no time to help raise a child. Tha ks for all your help you guys hopefully you all can help me convince her into accepting that best case she lives in town with her aunt till college.

ScottGem · Jan 10, 2012, 04:22 AM

You sound like you have, at least a level head on your shoulders.

I would make one last stab at the father. Explain to him that you love his daughter and you are willing to wait until she is 18 and resume the relationship then. Tell him though, that if he tries to keep you two apart, she will resent him and you don't want that to happen.