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    Stupotblues's Avatar
    Stupotblues Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 26, 2011, 01:07 PM
    One sided love is killing me
    I am in love with a girl already in a relationship. Sad but oh so very true. I'm not an average one sided love story I would like to think but then again love blinds people and makes them think weird things. She has been in a relationship with this boy for around 2 years I guess. Around a year ago they split up for around a week and me and her got very close. I was building up the courage to ask her out but then she went on holiday for a week and when she came back she and him where back together they had been texting over that week whilst I had no contact with her.

    Back then I didn't feel that bad in fact I just shrugged it off. Our relationship was kept at just friends for a while then it suddenly blossomed we became best friends as it were telling each other everything etc staying up late texting. Then I confessed my feelings for her to an extent and she... well she didn't reject me but didn't accept me. She became confused. Didn't know who to pick her boyfriend or me.

    Then one night at a party he and her had massive argument (they had been bad for a while) they almost broke up but just got back together. Me and her were alone and talked about us and she kissed me a full on kiss not just a peck and said she was going to break up with him tonight but her friend sort of got them back together.

    I was so happy she had kissed me my first ever proper kiss as well, I was over the moon. This carried on to another few parties we kissed again. But then suddenly she wouldn't speak to me she ignored me for a few days and now she hardly speaks to me when we used to talk on a daily basis. It is killing me on the inside I'm so depressed. I don't know if its my fault or what? Or maybe she just doesn't like me anymore. But it is very hard seeing her everyday we share the same classes and sit beside each other in most of them ( I'm 17 BTW).

    This past week has been misery for me and I can't take much more I'm so sad and I don't know what to do . Any advice please or just some encouragement :( ?
    Sammy4BRD's Avatar
    Sammy4BRD Posts: 2, Reputation: 2
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    #2

    Nov 26, 2011, 05:41 PM
    Hey, I read your thing about this girl. The same thing happened to me. What you have to do is ask her what is wrong. If she doesn't tell you, then you also have to ignore her. I'm not saying that you have to get over her but just stop thinking about her for a while. She will begin to ask herself why you are ignoring her, just like you are. She will start to see that you can also live without her and she will want you immediately. Don't worry about her boyfriend. It worked with me. That girl is now my girlfriend for 3 years. :)
    DoulaLC's Avatar
    DoulaLC Posts: 10,488, Reputation: 1952
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    #3

    Nov 26, 2011, 06:04 PM
    If she is in a relationship, she isn't really available for you to try to get involved with her as anything more than a friend. Would you want some other guy trying to move in on your girlfriend?

    She likely does not want to lose you as a friend. She was confused about her feelings for you, kissed you, and realised that she wants to be with her boyfriend.

    IF she wanted to be in a more serious relationship with you, she would be, as it is easy enough for her to break up with her boyfriend and she already knows how you feel about her.

    No doubt she likes you, but perhaps she doesn't want to continue to give you the wrong impression that she likes you as more than a friend. So she is trying to not be quite as involved as she was before.

    Move on from the idea of her being with you as a girlfriend. It may happen at some point, but you can't waste your time waiting around for that possibility. Get more involved with other people. Say hi to her when you see her, ask her how she is doing, but try not to dwell on where you think things may have been heading. She obviously is not thinking the same thing at this time.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Nov 26, 2011, 07:55 PM
    It sucks being stuck on someone that still stuck on someone else. But its understandable, and you have to realize that it will never work like you want it to, but if you leave her alone and have fun with other friends, then you will eventually overcome that sadness.

    Consider this a lesson in letting go of hopeless situations.

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