[Mozzarellaa]

I am 18 and have lived with my boyfriend for a while now after being with him a year. For some reason, my grandparents never accepted me having boyfriends as they're old fashioned and now they're telling people that my boyfriend is beating me up and taking my money, when he really isn't like that! They also wind me up about it when I go round to visit (just a 10 minute walk away).

Also, it feels like my family are obsessed with me, for example, today, I started college at dinner time as a half day, but my grandparents saw me in the morning coming out of the doctors and sent me 5 texts having a go at me for 'not going to college' when I did, and now they want to know why I was at the doctors with my boyfriend!

Another problem I had which has stopped now is at one point, I found that my family were finding out EVERYTHING about me, as if they were stalking me or something! Because they even knew where I was at certain times!

More information;
- don't live/talk to my mum about totally different issues
- my family are nice to me most of the time and buy me things sometimes too

I just don't get what keeps happening! Please help :'( I've tried talking to them, didn't work; so that's out of the question.

[Wondergirl]

Wow! You've got an interesting situation going here.

How are family members finding out so quickly what you are up to?

Is your family usually in each other's business like they are yours, or are you somehow "special"?

[Mozzarellaa]

I seem to be somehow special lol! It's like I'm their main topic to talk about when my auntie goes round to see them! :/

And I'm not sure how they're finding out, I don't let people know my business over the Internet such as Facebook :(

It's scary lol! I just don't want to get the law involved as they are nice half the time, just psycho and obsessed with my life and what I'm doing/saying/going :/

[Wondergirl]

Are you the oldest child? Or maybe the only child? (I'm the oldest AND a girl, so everyone was always watching me... )

Is there a cultural thing going on?

[Mozzarellaa]

No, there's not a cultural thing going on :)

And yes, I'm the oldest girl, have a younger brother who I don't talk to through no choice of my own because he lives with my mum.
My grandparents don't talk to my mum through other reasons years ago.
I lived with my grandparents for a few months before my boyfriend's house.

Also, when I turned 18, my grandparents told me they'd fall out with me if I had a drop of alcohol (I live in uk so it's legal lol) which really angered me :/

My friends/boyfriend tell me they're just looking out for me, but I don't believe them, as it's so psycho :/
They also still treat me like I'm 5 years old too

[Wondergirl]

Let's talk more about your grandparents. Why are they so protective of you? Does someone in the family have a problem with alcohol?

Your screen name is an Italian cheese. Is there an Italian influence in your family?

[Thai2011]

It sounds like what every happened between your mum and them(grandparents)when your mum was growing up, they (grandparents) are afraid it will happen with you and their (grandparents) relationship. Your Aunties sound like busy bodies and very crafty. What you can do is ignore their keeping tabs on you, stay consistent with your goals (personal), stay consistent with loving them, don't engage in justifying your activities (don't answer questions about your personal life). Answer question with a question. For example: Why were you at the doctors' today (them), (you) Why, you were at the doctors' too? Lol... do it with a loving voice, it will throw them off. If they become mean verbally, just say that you have to go and you will talk or see them later (end it with an "I love you").

[Mozzarellaa]

No it just sounds a bit like my last name lol, my family are half English half Irish :)

And thank you :) that helped a lot, although I have tried the texting thing and it didn't work :/