[drnord]

My husband and I are somewhat convinced that his biological parents may not be that. He does not look like either of them at all nor like anyone else in his family. He has two brothers one that is biological and the other is a half brother. They both resemble his mother greatly. We are wanting to find out if these are his parents but without letting them know as we don't want to hurt their feelings in case he is their biological child (although we feel pretty strongly that he could have been switched at birth). Any suggestions as to how we can obtain a dna sample from them without their knowledge?

[ScottGem]

You can try collecting hair samples from their hair brushes. Another possibility is enlisting the brother's help.

[Fr_Chuck]

But what real reasons, beyond looks, since that has nothing to do with it, what reasons do you believe you are adopted.

Example, I have five sons, ( one adopted) If I lined them all up in a row, and asked which one looks most like me, guess which one 9 out of 10 people will pick, the adopted one. I am also adopted, but have a photo of my "bio dad" guess what I look much more like my adopted dad.

And why does it matter, where they bad parents, are you wanting to hurt them in some way ?

But get into the bath and steal hair from their hair brushes perhaps.

[drnord]

First of all we do not believe he is adopted, we believe he could have been switched when he was born. Yes, that does happen where your children do not resemble you but it is usually not the case. I personally do not know ANYONE that doesn't resemble someone in their family. There are several reasons that lead us to feel this way. My husband is extremely tall (6'4) in comparison to his immediate and extended family (to our knowledge no one is over six foot going back to great grandparents). His mother is about 5'2 and father is about 5'8. He also started balding in his early twenties and his biological brother is not, which from my knowledge this usually runs in male siblings with the same parents. Both For example I have three male cousins (same parents) and all started balding in their twenties. There have been several people that we have not even mentioned this to that have questioned if they were his parents. We just would like to find out for sure without hurting anyone's feelings

[Alty]

Hate to burst your bubble about the height thing, but my husband (who was raised by his bio parents), is 6'1". No one in his family is over 5'7", even the men. His mother was 5'3", and his father was 5'5".

He looks nothing like his mother, father, or sister. Actually, his sister also doesn't look like her parents.

It's not always the case that the child will look like his parents. Also, height has nothing to do with it. Most children grow taller then their parents. Heck, the blue eye brown eye theory is also not exact. Brown eyes are supposed to be dominant, so, if you have a brown eyed parent, you should have brown eyed kids, even if the other parent has blue eyes. My mother and all her 10 siblings were born to two brown eyed people, and only 2 of the 11 kids had brown eyes.

I have to ask, why are you and your husband wanting to do this? Will it make a difference if he finds out he's not their bio child? What's the next step after this, and to what gain?

[J_9]

Switched at birth? Really? You do realize how far fetched this is don't you?

[ScottGem]

While there have been cases of being switched at birth the odds are extreme. The younger your husband is the less likely this could have happened.

And genetics is a funny thing. There can be recessive genes that skip several generations.

[Fr_Chuck]

But the issue with stealing a hair to test is that most of the "whose the babies daddy" type labs will not be set up to do it from the hair, so it will be costly. Also unless you are using approved labs the results may not always be 100 percent correct.

[ebaines]

Heck, the blue eye brown eye theory is also not exact. Brown eyes are supposed to be dominant, so, if you have a brown eyed parent, you should have brown eyed kids, even if the other parent has blue eyes.

Not to get too far off track but this is not quite right. Brown eyes are indeed dominate, but all that means is that if you have one blue-eyed gene and one brown-eyed gene in you then you will be brown-eyed. It does not mean that blue eyes are impossible if either parent is has brown eyes. For example, if one parent has blue eyes you know he has two blue-eyed genes, and if the other parent has brown eyes either (a) that parent has two brown-eyed genes or (b) that parent has one blue-eyed and one brown-eyed gene. If (a) then the child will have brown eyes; if (b) then the child has a 50/50 chance of having either blue or brown eyes. In fact it's possible for both parents to have brown eyes and yet have a blue-eyed child (if both parents have one blue and one brown gene then the child has a 1/4 chance of having blue eyes).

Here ends the genetics lesson.