Check out some similar questions!

irish_girl_Unce · Jun 19, 2011, 06:27 PM

Ok so I was with my boyfriend a year and a half we have been madly in love and all that.. sometimes we break up but we are basically still together.. this timewe didn't talk for two weeks unless we were argueing . One day then I found out he kissed another girl.. I got really upset because we have been with each other for so long and not been with anyone else! My friends are saying its only a kiss but a kiss meaans more to me than they think. This has really upset me.. I talked to him about it and he said he was drunk and can't remember (well I don't no if I believe that he can't remember). One minute I say to myself its only a kiss the love we have is much more than some stupid kiss and then the next I break down and think well it is a kiss and well it means a lot.. I'm so confused I have mixed emotions about this incident. Basically I am asking three questions. One is should I forgive him ? And the second is How should I deal with this and my last one is: Is there any suggestions how to cope with this ? Please do not reply with its stupid . Thanks

Cat1864 · Jun 19, 2011, 07:54 PM

I am not going to say it is stupid. I am going to say that it does seem a bit unrealistic.

Frankly, if you keep breaking up and getting back together over and over again then you aren't working out the issues. You are only covering them up until the next time. That is not a healthy relationship. You should not get back together unless the issue has been resolved or is being actively worked on.

That leads to 'the kiss'. How did you find out about it? Are you sure that it happened?

IF you were broken up, then he was available-drunk or not.

IF you were just not speaking to each other but both of you still considered yourselves in a relationship, then 'the kiss', if it happened, should not have.

As for forgiving, only you know how strongly you feel about it. If you think that you will keep holding it against him and that it will always be a sore spot, then let him and everything else go now. Do you think you can work together to rebuild the trust?

IF you want the relationship to succeed, you cannot continue to punish him. You have made your feelings clear. You either let it go or let it undermine the foundation of your relationship. It is your choice.

As for how you move forward, don't dwell on it. Let it heal.

amicon · Jun 19, 2011, 10:33 PM

If you can't work on your issues,as a committed couple,in order to solve them and move forwards as a stronger couple-then you shouldn't be together.

Have a serioud think about whether you want to be in this relationship.

irish_girl_Unce · Jun 20, 2011, 07:26 AM

Thanks for the help :)

Cat1864 · Jun 20, 2011, 01:25 PM

Good luck with what ever you chose to do.

khan1234 · Nov 4, 2011, 08:49 PM

It just a kiss my wife sleep with other man and I am trying to work out with her. If you really love her talk to him and if he believe that should not be happen and he is sorry than move on enjoy rest of life without break up every morning