[Jason1981]

Hi, about 4 weeks ago, I found out that my Dad has pacreatic cancer. He has recently ungone surgery to remove the tumor but whilst attempting this the surgeon made the decision the tumor was to large to remove. I have since learnt that even if the tumor was removed it would not have been a cure. We have been told that there is not cure and the he may only have 1-2 years left. He will start chemo soon but this will only prolong life to maybe 3 years.

I have found this news heart breaking, I have always imagined my parents to be round forever. I feel physically sick every moment of the day and my sleep has been effected. My Dad is a strong man and has not shown any signs of being upset. He has a grand daughter who is only 2, again the thought of knowing she will never know what a great man he is reduces me to tears.

I don't know how to cope, knowing for however long he is going to die. Im trying not to let it show but its so hard.

[JudyKayTee]

My husband was very ill for five years. I know what you are going through - I lived with that diagnosis every day.

One of the things I learned was to take my lead from him - if he wanted to talk about things, we did. If he didn't, we did not.

Your father will go through many stages - probably including denial, anger, sorrow.

You can begin now, building memories for your daughter, taking photos. You also need to take care of yourself. Is there someone you can talk to, a support group?