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lis_help · Apr 1, 2011, 10:13 PM

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and 4months. We have been having problems with both sides of our family since the day go. Really only because we have different religions which really sucks because my mum and dad call his house all hrs of the day and night. It puts a lot of stress onto our life and is now the reason my befriend broke up with me.

I told him I want to convert and we can get married and live our own life without all the stress that comes along with it.. but he is worried that my parents well cause drama in the future. I understand where he is coming along saying all of this but I'm so hurt its not funny all the stress and pain I'm going through at the moment won't stop because I'm not with him.

I love him more then my parents could ever think and I love him more then my own family I would give my life for him but their comes a stage when nothing I do, seems to be working the only people who can change his mind are his parents but I can't even talk to them because they hate me cause of everything my parents have made me do in the past like breaking up with him, my parents treating him and his family. Seriously my parents are out of control at the moment and nothing I do will fix anything..

I was talking to my boyfriend or ex I guess you can say and we we are joking and laughing and it was so nice I really fall in love with him all over again. But then my mum bangs on my door I don't answer and she runs down stairs yelling that him that it I'm ringing his parents.. its 1am what normal person would do something so silly and again he gives me distance and won't talk to me because of something so silly my parents done..

I love him and I want to become a part of life and family but I'm just not sure how I'm meant to do something like this when his being so scared and worried.. any advice would be great by the way he's Muslim and I'm Catholic. He's 23 I'm 22 and I'm currently looking at getting an apartment cause I can't take this anymore..

talaniman · Apr 2, 2011, 10:07 AM

Moving away from your parents may give you some peace, but I doubt it changes their attitude. Seems the way you and your boyfriend handle yourselves through these obstacles is what will decide if there is hope for the future to build a life together.

I wish you luck, but you better start taking a stronger stance with the behavior of your own parents in my opinion. What you have described is borderline harassment, but if you live in their house, its just bad behavior.

While I am not one who says changing religions to appease everyone else is a great thing, I will say respecting other religions is better. I advise extreme caution in anyone who converts to another religion to appease to get what they want, as opposed to wanting to convert for the right reasons. That you deeply believe in that conversion.

If your conversion is to be with this fellow, love or not, that should give you pause for a lot of deep thinking before you jump into it. I can see your parents view, because later is to late as you learn the price of your wanting to convert.

It's a lot more complicated than just saying you are a Muslim, or a Catholic, its what you have to truly believe for yourself, even without him.

sahar. · Apr 10, 2011, 09:44 AM

Hi
I think you should live with your boy friend and stay away from your family and also his familly Bcoz you can not destroy your life Bcoz of your family and all their thinking style. If you really really love him do it now.make sure he loves you too.do not annoy your parents , just leave them , then they can understand how much you are valuable.
Wish you all the best...

Edy020 · Apr 11, 2011, 01:45 PM

Before you make a major decision like converting to the religion of Islam, please read the Holy Khoran. You need to make an informed decision about religion, not based on your feelings for him, but on your own knowledge.
If you still decide that this is the right choice for you, then you can proceed from there. Especially, you need to know what their belief system is as it pertains to marriage, wife, and family. This is a decision that you should not make lightly.
Also, your parents may not know how to show that they are concerned for you. Give it some time before you make any life altering decisions. Good luck to you both.