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Racin5m · Feb 24, 2011, 08:10 PM

My daughter is 5, her mother has custody.. She pawns her off on relatives a couple days a week and she has introduced her to at least 6 different men as her boyfriend. I am not happy with the example she is setting for my daughter, what can I do to either get custody or have a judgement against her to stop this behavior?

jenniepepsi · Feb 24, 2011, 11:49 PM

Its not illigal to have boyfriends, and its not illigal to get babysitters. So no you can not get an order against her to stop it. It is her life and her choice.

You can file for joint custody, and fight it out in court. Why does mother have custody. Is there child support? Please give more details.

redhed35 · Feb 25, 2011, 12:14 AM

Moved from parenting to family law.

cdad · Feb 25, 2011, 04:18 AM

Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

its not illigal to have boyfriends, and its not illigal to get babysitters. so no you can not get an order against her to stop it. it is her life and her choice.

you can file for joint custody, and fight it out in court. why does mother have custody. is there child support? please give more details.

Actually you can generrate court orders to control certain behavior. The thing is that it has to be in the child's best interest. In the case of the revolving door of boyfriends it is possible to limit it by way of exposure to the daughter.

ScottGem · Feb 25, 2011, 04:26 AM

Depending on the climate of the courts that have jurisdiction, you MIGHT get the court to admonish the mother about the example she is setting for your daughter. But I doubt if this is enough to change custody.

But you asked "What can I do". The answer is simple. You get a lawyer and submit a petition in court. The only way to do anything about it is in court unless the mother can be convinced to change her ways.

Racin5m · Feb 25, 2011, 05:02 AM

She was awarded custody as we could not agree on anything, then she alleged anger claims(not abuse)..
All part of the 3 step process to gain custody. And yes $1000 a month in child support and day care. This is not about her at all, I am trying to ensure that OUR daughter is raise with some structure and moral values.. Its not OK to use or depend on others for your survival as she is being shown. If she was to get married and remain with one would be the best thing for my daughter.

AK lawyer · Feb 25, 2011, 07:06 AM

Originally Posted by Racin5m

... If she was to get married and remain with one would be the best thing for my daughter.

Easier said than done. You going to ask a court to order her to get married and stay married? Although she and you split apart at one time? Good luck with that. :D

Racin5m · Feb 25, 2011, 11:55 AM

No, I am not asking a court to get her married. I am asking that she limit he exposure to men in my daughters life until she can or wants to be married.. This will provide some consistency in her life... AK, I don't even understand where you got that from? Looking for help not sarcasm

Racin5m · Feb 25, 2011, 11:57 AM

How would I go about getting the court to admonish the mother. And what would be the result if I were successful?

Racin5m · Feb 25, 2011, 12:02 PM

I am not trying to change my ex's life but I am trying to protect and raise my daughter right. Its also her daughter and she should have the same responsibilities. This is not about my ex... and I don't care about the boyfriends.. Just limit the exposure to the revolving door of men in her life...

ScottGem · Feb 25, 2011, 04:11 PM

First, please use the Answer options for followups. Not the Comments.

You can't ask a court to admonish her. That's not the courts job. I'm just saying that, if you go to court for a change in custody, that's the most that's likely to happen.

I understand that you want her to live by your morals, but the courts are not likely to agree with your morals.

AK lawyer · Feb 25, 2011, 04:45 PM

Originally Posted by Racin5m

... what can I do to either get custody or have a judgement against her to stop this behavior?

Originally Posted by AK lawyer

... Good luck with that.

Originally Posted by Racin5m

.... AK, i dont even understand where you got that from? Looking for help not sarcasm

I apologize if you perceived my remarks as sarcasm. I simply indicated that, in my opinion, you cannot get a judge to try stopping that behavior (e.g.: having multiple romantic interests), and suggested why to attempt to do so would be irrational.