[That0neGuy10]

So about a week ago my GF of 3.5 years decided that she needed space in this relationship to sort out her life and figure out who she is as a person and where she fits in in this world. Im 23 and she is 20 She is a very hard worker and very hard on herslf when she makes a mistake. She is currently in college and working and taking on SO many roles right now in her life and is truly on overload, a few days before our break up she told me she is 'very depressed" and that she's not happy right now (I believe this because I know her VERY well and she just looked drained when she said this) She also told me she's at a point in her life where she feels like she has to do this on her own or she will never be happy. I love her so much and the hardest thing to do is give her this space she is asking for but I love her and respect her so Im giving it to her. She said she still loves me and is still in love with me and that she's not ruling out a future for us. So yesterday after a week of no contact I sent her a text message. I said I've been thinking about you a lot and hope your doing well. I still love you and am here for you and was wondering after this week of finals was over if she wanted to talk... no response back... I feel like I made a mistake getting in contact with her... but I also felt at the same time like I HAD to let her know that I was not giving up on her... depressed people push the ones who love them the most away, I've been reading up on the signs of depression and trying to understand what she is going through. I know when deperssed people push loved ones away they don't was us to give up on them... I can't help but feel like the text I sent should not of been sent and that I might be pushing her away trying to contact her... but I turn right around again and feel like she needed to know... im going to stop contacting her again for a week and see how everything goes... I just am wondering what everyone thinks here... was I right in sending her that text? I was not being pushy or putting pressure on her I just felt like she is isolating herslef making her situation worse and I needed to let her know Im not giving up on her or what we had.

[Devorameira]

I understand that you wanted to let her know that you are still there for her if she needs you, but she's told you that she wants some space right now, so you need to respect that.

If you think that she's really depressed, you might talk to one of her family members and/or close friends and tell them that you are concerned about her behavior so they can keep an eye on her. Other than that, there's nothing you can do right now.

[rbilow]

Personally I think it was her polite way of dumping you. I mean how long to get her act together 1 month? 2 years? You have to decide if you want to wait and how long to wait, and hope you won't be walking down the street one day and see she's dating someone else.

[talaniman]

When someone ask for space, you as them how much because, its not fair to have someone dangling in limbo. You can bet if she asks for space its usually the opening act for a break up, and you bow out gracefully. Many of us who have gone through this have wondered why they haven't called, or like you, just want them to know that you are concerned, miss them, and want them to know we are still here waiting.

I did to until I realized after it happening that they had other options, and its best after the "need space" talk, its best to do your own thing, and leave them alone. If they miss you they will call, but if they don't then you know its over. She may call, she may not, but being in limbo is not where you want to be so start doing your own thing, and let her do hers! Waiting for a response for whatever reason only drives you crazy with presuming, and assuming, and may lead YOU to some impulsive emotional responses that make things even worse for yourself.

When they need space give them all they need, for as long as they need it. No ifs, ands or butts, and leave their friends and family alone.

[Dashing360]

MAH BOY. I was just in the same situation last month. The same **** happened to meh. My girlfriend of a long time told meh she wanted space to see where she fits in this world and works on herself. I let my emotions get to me. I kept texting her how could she do this to meh and does she still want to be with me , etc... ; and 9 days later ; she breaks up with meh. Being on a break hurts because you don't know if you're still together with her or not because she flirts with other people but when she sees you she acts like she never knew you. SMFH ; the best thing to do is be prepared for breakup ; and LET your emotions get to you. Let me just tell you ; when she broke up with me. I threw a fit and begged her not to do it but she did it anyway. She broke it off to find out where she lives in this world, and wanted her space, and liked another male -________- and the thing is HE HAD A GIRLFRIEND!! So after we broke up, I haven't texted her in 3 weeks ; every time I see her in the hallways I would act like my life is perfect, singing in the hallway, talking about my basketball games or my jersey number, etc... EVERYTIME. And then the guy she liked Didn't break up with his girlfriend for her even though she did it for him... and he called her a mistress aka his "side chick" . So when she heard this she was hurt, and then during the next day, I FINALLY got over her by talking to this new girl who didn't go to my school. And then I told my best friend who was in all her classes to talk about meh and the new girl mad loud so she can hear it. He did this for a week; and then she realized my life was perfect without her, I found someone else, and she made a mistake. Then guess what... she starts posting on Facebook **** about a second chance , like songs relating to that and then guess what happened that weekend ? SHE TEXTED MEH!! See , the best thing for you to do man is continue loving her and letting your emotions to her, so if you do end and she regrets it she can be like "he loved me so much. he begged me to stay and i always said no. now i regret it" like . But still give her her space but text her once a week and ask her how she's doing because you don't want to make it feel like your single.

[cksummergurl]

I am in the same situation except with my boyfriend, he suffers from depression and when he is having one of his episodes from not taking his medication, he often pushes me away by not answering texts, not calling me like he usually does and I often feel as though I am doing something wrong. Its not easy, but I let him know that I will not give up and he knows it. I often cry because I am sad for him, but also myself. I know I probably shouldn't cry because I am not the one with the disorder, but I think the person on the outside is more likely to cry.