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    viry2cute's Avatar
    viry2cute Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 18, 2010, 04:30 PM
    Why do guys say they love you but hurt you? I don't get it.
    Okay so I love him so much we've been on and off but so in love even when we weren't together for like a year and a half now! I love him right we just got back together like not even 2 months ago, I thought things were going good but then I guess I started my nold ways breakinug up with hi for stupid reasons, but I only do this because he pisses me off =( n yea I regret doing it but **** man it hurts because I hella love him but anyway.. this is what hurts the most, I thought things were going good and then one day I go on hus Facebook, when like not even a minute before he had told me he deleted it, and I go on it and he approved all these girls and he commented on a girls picture, its like u say u love me but you don't do that to some one u love right?. I started crying because that fuken hurts I don't want to see that. So I confronted him about it and he denied it he was all stopn trippi its nothing but **** him because he wouldn't have done that if he actually didn't mean it, why waist your time? I hate him I changed my number! I don't want to be wit him I know I can do muvh better but it hurts because the memories we had are good, we had bad one too but **** those. Ugh I hate him but love him but I want to move on I rele do this is like the 3rd chance I've gave him and he's ****ed them all up so **** him I'm gone forever!!
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
    Welbeing Expert
     
    #2

    Nov 18, 2010, 04:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by viry2cute View Post
    Okay so i love him so much we've been on and off but so in love even when we werent together for like a year and a half now! I love him right we just got back together like not even 2 months ago, i thought things were going good but then i guess i started my nold ways breakinug up with hi for stupid reasons, but i only do this kuz he pisses me off =( n yea i regret doing it but **** man it hurts kuz i hella love him but anyway.. this is wat hurts the most, i thought things were going good and then one day i go on hus facebook, when like not even a minute before he had told me he deleted it, and i go on it and he approved all these girls and he commented on a girls picture, its like u say u love me but you dnt do that to some one u love right?.. i started crying kuz that fuken hurts i dnt wanna see that. so i confronted him about it and he denied it he was all stopn trippi its nothing but **** him kuz he wouldnt have done that if he actually didnt mean it, why waist ur time? I hate him i changed my number! i dnt wanna be wit him i kno i can do muvh better but it hurts kuz the memories we had are good, we had bad one too but **** those. ugh i hate him but love him but i wanna move on i rele do this is like the 3rd chance ive gave him and hes ****ed them all up so **** him im gone forever!!!!!!!!!!
    Just a few things here. First of all, you have to realize that when a person keeps breaking up with their partner over and over again for stupid reasons, that gets old after a while.

    That right there shows me that there is no communication in the relationship. Just to end things abruptly, which won't work in a relationship.

    Next, you check his Facebook account, which to me shows that there is no trust in the relationship.

    So far, no trust or communication. Those are the two main things that you need to have in a successful relationship.

    Ok, what were some reasons you would break up with him?

    Also, are these random girls that he accepted on FB? Or does he know them?

    HOw old are you two?
    ITstudent2006's Avatar
    ITstudent2006 Posts: 2,243, Reputation: 329
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    #3

    Nov 18, 2010, 10:59 PM

    Why do guys say they love you but hurt you? I don't get it. =(
    I agree with enigma 100%.

    I just need to add one thing.

    Don't assume all guys are the same. We are not all the same. We act, talk, walk and do different things in different ways. Next time lets not put this stereotype on all guys!

    Also, is it that hard to type the word because and capitalize I's, and when you swear so much in a post I have to play the guessing game on what you're trying to say. I'd rather read the post and not play games!
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,223, Reputation: 1077
    Welbeing Expert
     
    #4

    Nov 18, 2010, 11:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ITstudent2006 View Post
    Why do guys say they love you but hurt you? I don't get it. =(
    I agree with enigma 100%.

    I just need to add one thing.

    Don't assume all guys are the same. We are not all the same. We act, talk, walk and do differnt things in different ways. next time lets not put this stereotype on all guys!

    Also, is it that hard to type the word because and capitalize I's, and when you swear so much in a post I have to play the guessing game on what you're trying to say. I'd rather read the post and not play games!


    I tried to give you a green, I have to share the love.

    I agree with you. She shouldn't put all men in the same category. It's unfair.
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
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    #5

    Nov 19, 2010, 10:09 AM
    Comment on ITstudent2006's post
    I agree... we ARE NOT all the same. For example, I am cooler :) Joking.
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
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    #6

    Nov 19, 2010, 10:26 AM
    What did he do?

    I understand you getting mad because he made a comment on someone's picture, what was the comment, was it a friendly thing or was it a "I want to bang you" comment, I am wondering what from that is what made you so mad that you feel you couldn't have a civilized conversation with him so that he could explain things to you, like stated earlier, communication is not something you have with him.

    Then, this is the third chance you give him? Why did you give him so many? It is rare for there to be a second chance much less a third, or a fourth, if you keep doing that your break ups mean NOTHING! He is getting used to them, dam it has been so many times he might actually enjoy them now, maybe he uses the break before you come to him again to do his own thing while you are sitting there pondering what to do with the guy you "love".

    The checking of the Facebook, maybe you are done with this guys but I am expecting for you to be with a guy in the future, I will say this once, FACEBOOK AND CELL PHONE ARE HIS!! You have NO right to check those, just because you have the availability of them don't. Not because I want you to be lied to and cheated on, but there are two main reasons you shouldn't. First, when you look through something you are doing it in a negative mentality so anything (maybe just a friendly "hi") will make you feel jealous, trust me, I have been there more than once, it is torture to yourself and damaging to your relationship, nothing good can come from it. Second, it shows him that you don't trust him at all, and without trust a relationship becomes a ticking bomb in which it is a matter of time before it ends, and normally very abruptly.

    You are going to have to learn, either with this guy or the next, how to control your feelings of jealousy because no one will put up with it forever, so remember, if you can't stop, you need professional help, keep it in check or your relationships will always end in a check mate.

    Normally, when people break up with someone, they have bad and GOOD things to say about the person, I only saw bad on yours. Where is the love? Your idea of love is corrupted if you believe that continuing to break up and get together and looking through his privacy is based on love, that is wrong. So STOP! Control yourself! This guy did not say love you and hurt you, he said love you, and you decided to hurt yourself. It feels like you are playing a sick game, if I was him, I would have cut you off my list of friend a LONG time ago.

    Have some respect for yourself and find someone that loves you, someone who you can trust, someone who you have a great deal of communication, someone who you completely feel comfortable around, and someone who feels the same way as you feel about them, it will take some work to find this person, but it will pay off, unfortunately this is not that person.

    And please, like stated above, do not give us all a bad name because of what one guy might have done, the title of this post could also be edited from the word "guys" to "girls", is individual people doing the damage not the whole group.

    Good Luck,

    Javi
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #7

    Nov 20, 2010, 08:42 PM
    So your breaking up with him for stupid reasons (your words) is not hurtful when you say you love him?

    Sounds like too much drama both ways.

    A good idea is to not get back together with an ex unless you know what went wrong and have addressed that issue (or issues) completely. And even then, sometimes two good people who love each other can just be flat out wrong for each other.

    But I don't buy the why are guys cruel line. I've had two loves cheat on me and lie to me deliberately. Guys can be awful. Women can be awful. Neither gender has a hedge on lousy behavior.

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