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Denziel · Oct 29, 2010, 03:48 PM

I'm going to keep this very short. There is a girl who I like and have known for some time she is a bit younger than me which is not a problem. She also used to have a crush on me but nothing ever happened! She has just split with her boyfriend of three years and we have become quite good friends but she is still raw from the split and has feelings for the ex. I really like her and she knows how I feel and I try to distance myself from her but we still always end up chatting etc! I am starting to slowly loose my mind! I want her but I don't want to ruin things by using bull in a china shop antics/tactics WHAT DO I DO?

California USA

Devorameira · Oct 30, 2010, 05:22 AM

The only thing you can do it to be patient. The girl just got out of a relationship and is still hurting from it, so don't try to complicate the matter.

If you try to move in on her now, you might only end up being the rebound guy and they never ever last.

Just be friends for now and maybe when she's totally over him she'll be ready to move on.

talaniman · Oct 30, 2010, 07:45 AM

Enjoy her friendship. Be patient, and be a gentleman. Don't get carried away by your own feelings at no time, and be cool, calm, and collected all the time. If something develops, fine, if not its still good.

The key is you staying in control of yourself, and not just be a vulture waiting for scraps, or as you say a bull in a china shop.

I have to be honest with you, I have no clue if she will ever be ready, willing, or able to return your romantic notions. I don't know her, but she may just want to heal, and have fun with friends right now, and it could be a long time before she wants to be someone's girl friend. So spending a lot of time with her, with high hopes for more, is not realistic, and I think it wise to balance your life with other people, and activities, and not make her the absolute focus of your life.

How old are the both of you? Your ages may give some insights into your situation.

Denziel · Oct 30, 2010, 08:33 PM

Comment on talaniman's post

Good wise advice and exactly what I needed to read! Thanks! I'm 29 She is 22! And as from I intend to explore other avenues! Cheers for the words. Appreciate it!

Comment on Devorameira's post

Hopefully dude! We shall see! Thanks for taking the time to reply! Appreciate it!

none12345 · Oct 30, 2010, 08:37 PM

You be there for her and wait for her to be able to have a healthy relationship, and that's when you make your move. Or you let her know you like her a lot and tell her when she is over da ex, you are going to be the first to ask her out. =P