[Boogs28]

My GF of 5.5 years asked me for a break... Im 23, and she is 22... she wants space to take a step back and figure things out, she said its nothing Ive done, she said she definitely loves me, and insisted there was nobody else, I have had no contact with her for exactly a week now, and its been hard. How long do I go before contacting her? Do I just wait for her to contact me? What else can I do?

[Wondergirl]

Wait. No Contact. A "break" usually means "it's over."

You've been monopolizing each other for five and a half years. She wants to look around "just in case."

[talaniman]

Give her what she ask for, and do your own thing. Why should you be confused because she is? You are free to explore your world without her, and after 5 and a half years together, you have a lot of catching up to do.

Above all leave her alone, even if its forever. That's what she asked for!!

[Devorameira]

I hate it when people ask for a break because it generally ends up being a break-up. Most times when a woman asks for a break, she's pretty darn sure she wants to break-up, but only wants to keep you around as a back-up plan in case she doesn't find anyone else.

Don't get me wrong, some people do take breaks and get back together, but it doesn't happen very often.

You need to live your life as if you were broken up for good. Don’t hang out with her and don’t contact her. This is the only way you’ll stay sane throughout “the break.”

Who knows? Maybe once you see this break for the break up that it most likely is, you’ll find that you don't really want her anymore. Either way, this woman has cut you loose; it’s about time you did the same.

[ironhide262]

Totally agree with all the other posters.

She wants space? Tell her to strap herself to a rocket! Hell, tell her you will even be happy to give her a countdown and push that big red button for her! One thing is for sure, for the last while she has been reconfiguring her navigational computer to escape your gravitational pull! Who knows where her destination is or if universal influence will bring her back.
Sorry dude... I don't mean to make light of your situation with this silly analogy. But after 5.5 yrs of love and friendship you get this silly, pathetic reason?
Let her go... it's all about you now.

[answerme_tender]

She has been with you since she was 16.5 years old. She needs to get out and see what life has to offer her. Just because she wants to that on her own with no ties to anyone doesn't make her a bad person, it just means she is coming into her own.
This is a perfect time for you to also try to get out and see what is out there for you. Im not saying so much in relationships, but things that will help you as an individual. Get out take some classes, volunteer, coach little kids in some type of sports.
Don't contact her. Its hard to lose a person you love. But remember its not the end of you. It just means you are going to start another chapter in your life.

[mmresd]

Is one thing to be asked for "space" and another one to ask for a "break". While they both imply the same thing... that your girlfriend needs space, one is slightly worst than the other in my opinion. When they ask for space they need space to think about how your relationship is going or maybe they just have their plate full and need space to get their own stuff handled. When they ask for a break, it normally means that they are not wanting to be with you anymore, but that they don't want to hurt your feelings, or at least not yet. Go talk to her one last time and ask her what her plans are. Tell her that you do not want her leading you on if this is going to result in what is most likely to result in, a complete break-up. So don't be surprised by her answer and after you hear that start moving on, because in her mind, it sounds like you two are done, and although she hasn't told you her final decision, her final decision has already been made.

Good Luck,

Javi

[Gmoney25]

I can totally relate. I'm going through the same thing right now. It hurts, it sucks, it's confusing. You ask yourself why over and over and how are you supposed to NOT talk to someone that you have seen and talked to everyday for the last few years. Fight the urge to contact her. You can bet that she is talking to her friends and they are all full of great advice for her. You need to reconnect with your friends, esp. if you have distanced yourself from them due to the relationship with her. You are still young and you will find someone who wants to be with you (and doesn't need time to know for sure).

It helps coming on this site and reading everyone else's story. Some you will relate to and some will make you laugh and say it could be worse. Stay as busy as you can with various activities and friends. That along with time helps the most.

[talaniman]

Never understood why when a partner ask for space, or a break, no one asks "for how long?", or "how much?"

If they say a week fine, if they say "I don't know!"... still fine, because you know what to do, give them what they ask for, and do your own thing.

Bottom line, always have your own thing to do, be the partner gone on vacation, or leaving for her own thing forever, no matter how long you have been together. Beats sitting, and wondering when limbo will end.

[Boogs28]

Every person that replied, pretty much thinks its over... why can't a break just strengthin our relationship? And so the overwhelming answer is DO NOT CONTACT HER? Does that mean not at all until she hits me up? Or after a certain amount of time, can I make a move?

[talaniman]

If you contact her before she is ready, that's not giving her what she asked for, is it? Read some of the other posts here about people who couldn't stand the wait, and started to bug the ex, to get back together, yet drove them even further away. Then you may understand what we are talking about. If she doesn't contact you in due time, at least your already doing your thing and not dwelling on hers. That will drive you crazy.

Nobody knows if its over or not. YOU don't for sure, but now its about your own dignity, and self respect, and that's the priority.

[answerme_tender]

Boogs28

We can only give our opinions based on our experiences that we have either lived through ourselves or witnessed. We are not fortune tellers.
Bottom line here is YOU feel that her requesting space is going to strengthen your relationship then what is the problem with waiting for her to contact you.

[vanheart]

That's a nice way of saying "later.." without her feeling the guilt of breaking your heart.

Join the club, man. Go NC & giver her the best gift you can, By disappearing.

She's already decided. Whatever you do, don't be her friend.

Don't be a wuss like her, be a man & stand up. That's means pressing delete.

Give her what she wants. Not you.

[mmresd]

Don't contact her until she contacts you, and if she does don't "start talking" to her again, just keep it super casual, and plan on it being forever, it doesn't have a time limit when you are trying to get over her.

Good Luck,

Javi