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tanjae · Oct 11, 2010, 07:17 PM

Every time I ask there is always a problem.He thinks that I am selffish because I ask for sex. We have been together 8 years and married for 4.I am at the point of I don't know what to do can anyone help?

donf · Oct 13, 2010, 06:17 AM

Sorry for the delay in responding to you.

I believe you need to sit with your husband and ask him why he no longer wants to make love with you.

(I'm old fashioned. I do not believe in "Having Sex" because to me sex is an extension of the love I have for my Lady. It is not an obligation, rather it is a sharing of ourselves with each other)

Trust me when I say there are others with a much more open view of sex. But its just not my view.

Somehow or someway he has either lost interest in sex or you.

Since he remains with you I'm willing to bet that it is not you.

There can be many reasons from physical to mental and every thing in between.

None of which can be worked upon until the problem is out in the open.

I also suggest that you try to have this discussion without demanding or requesting sex.

answerme_tender · Oct 13, 2010, 06:57 AM

I agree with Donf, it may not have anything to do with you. It could be something going on with your husband, rather it be physical or emotional. As he been in for a physical lately, and if not have him go and I would maybe called the doctor prior to his appointment and tell him your concerns. That way he maybe able to ask your husband some more precise questions. Its just a thought. Good luck and keep us posted

melanie34 · Oct 17, 2010, 03:04 AM

He needs to seek professional help for his problem. You could do this together or he could I do it separately. A friend of mine has been referred to an emotional sexual counsellor in England, who will try and get to the root of the common problem. He can not expect you to just continue with a sexless marriage without even discussing the issue. It is selfish of him to do so. I understand totally how it makes you feel because I have been there. My husband is on tablets for anxiety which depress his sex drive. There is a reason for it, but it still doesn't help.

talaniman · Oct 17, 2010, 01:16 PM

Often a lack of sex indicates a problem in other areas of the relationship that need addressing, so look around, and see if there is something besides sex that your missing, or ignoring, or changes that you both have, and are dealing with.

The lack of sex may be just a symptom of something else that's wrong.