[anacecilia]

I don't know if this is the proper forum for this question, but I was wondering if anyone out there who has been hurt time and time again because they have deeply loved, has actually been able to fully recover and have hope that true love does exist and can be worthwhile pursuing. I've taken a lot of risks when it comes to love and every time I wind up getting deeply hurt because of betrayal or because I am not loved in return. I trust and believe in the person, only to discover in the end that it was a huge mistake to do so. And then I hurt. I've tried to keep the hope, but I struggle with the thought and fear of being alone forever... while at the same time I'm starting to believe that maybe that is not so bad because at least I won't be risking getting hurt again. I'm a hopeless romantic and quite passionate, and recently have been told that perhaps that is my problem! That I'll never find a guy who feels as passionate and romantic about life and things as me... Made me think that perhaps that is what has turned guys away for so many years. But I can't turn that off... and the irony that it is that passion and romantic side of me that makes my yearning to be in a relationship so strong. I've never had someone be in love with me, and I'm really running out of time to have a family and a marriage with kids etc. That's the reality... Has anyone out there been in the same or similar position?? How does one regain hope and trust in people. Especially when all around me I'm constantly hearing about heartbreak, divorce, kids' lives being torn apart because of divorce etc. etc. etc. Not sure if I'm really asking a question! I just guess I want to hear from folks who might be or have been in my same shoes. Thanks!

[eveamee09]

I'm probably not experienced enough or old enough to answer this question, but my reply would be yes - I do believe in love. Even though we hear so many awful stories about divorce etc, I still think we hear many wonderful stories of love and happiness. It depends how you define love I suppose. For me, it doesn't just have to be about passion and desire, it's also got a very commitment-ty and REAL element to it, where the person loves you no matter what, despite flaws/imperfections and despite ageing and appearances. Because you say you've been hurt so many times before I understand why it must be so difficult to carry on believing - but I think that hope is imporant and the realisation that there are many happy couples (like my Grandparents!) who claim to love each other unconditionally and seem to have such an amazing bond is definitely worth thinking about.

Just because you've never experienced something doesn't mean it does not exist. Some people will never get on or see an aeroplane for example, but they still exist and other people have had experience of it. Unfortunately some never get to experience it, or they experience different types (like the love of a parent or a friend), but still, that doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

If you keep thinking negatively and stop believing in love, then you won't be able to recognise it when it hits you. Perhaps this negative outlook might be what is holding you back from meeting someone who can give you back the love you deserve.

I have sort of waffled on and on but I think it was a good and interesting question. I think I'm quite hopelessly romantic too and am dreaming of meeting someone in the future who gives me that special love back! Good luck! :)

[Eileen G]

Yes, love exists, and it's worth a lot of failed efforts and heart ache.

However, I believe it's important to be happy in who you are, and what you are doing with your life. Meeting a person who you can love should be a huge bonus, not the reason for your life.

[talaniman]

Love to me is what you do with a partner, and its much deeper than a feeling. Bad times happen, but a true committed partner stays for those bad times, so its sharing, and working together, no matter what life throws at you that counts.

Call it love, but I would rather have respect, and loyalty, and a willingness to be able to honestly express feelings, and being understood, above that touchy feely stuff. That's romance enough for me, and that we support each other and can be mad, and angry sometimes. I guess she has to adjust to me, as much as I have to adjust to her.

Honestly though, I have been dumped by some super stars, but today I have no regrets because, my last girlfriend stayed for the last 30 something years, and I hope she won't change her mind about staying for a bit longer. You never know, but its still worth the risk.

No matter how bad you have been hurt in the past, you WILL recover, and be stronger, and smarter for it. As long as you love yourself, and your life, and are willing to share it, even for a short time, I think eventually some one will stay, and keep sharing it, and love every minute.

[floaton]

Don't set a deadline for yourself to live. What if you settle for someone totally wrong because you just want to have a family and then live in regret? Good things come to those who wait so please just try to let love come to you. It WILL happen. You are by all means NOT to blame. Whoever told you that you may be at fault is not someone you should be listening to. Be yourself and when you find that someone who truly loves you for exactly what you are then you will know. You will know and you'll realize that it was worth the wait. We may not all find that someone... it's true but you obviously have a very big heart and it needs to be shared.
Just don't settle for anyone. I hope you feel better about everything. Remember... if you love life then life will love you back.

[dunsknights78]

I'm 15 years old and I don't believe in love... sad huh? I've been hurt too many times to actually
Believe that there really is somebody out there somebody somewhere... thats made for you...
I've been too hurt to believe that my prince charming will come one day and rescue me from this hell I'm living in right now...
Its kind of hard to believe in love when your parents argue 24/7, you have stress, guys have hurt you in the past... and after acknowleding this and
Much more crap that you wouldn't believe a 15 year old has been through its kind of hard to believe in love and believe that all men are
Different... I think my opinion may or may not change... only time can tell me... maybe someday my so called prince charming will walk
Into my life and actually make me believe all men are different and love does exist... but we'll see... </3