[stephy8805]

I'm still married but I moved out of state to get a fresh start with my daughter and rented a house with my boyfriend who I recently split up with. I went to court and joint custody was entered when my husband wanted full custody because I moved away from him and took our daughter with me so now our daughter is like a package being delivered every week.

My main question is, can social networking such as MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, MyYearBook and others have an affect on divorce and child custody determination? Could it have an impact on the proceedings in court?

Like for example, lets say before a hearing I give a sworn statement that I live in such and such city but on one of my social networking profiles I list an entirely different city as my current home (let's say my husbands city.) continuing, lets say I also swore in an affidavit that I have a boyfriend whom I live with but on one of my social networking sites, it says I'm now single and recently split up with my boyfriend (which is true but my husband didn't know that until he found out through this profiles)

Because it contradicts what I gave in my affidavit, what are the legal ramifications of that, if any?

I ask because my husband was furious when he called me and told me he surfed the web and found one of my profiles and took screenshots on a computer and says he emailed them to his attorney and wants to use them against me in court because I lied. I don't see it as lying well I just didn't tell my husband the truth... but the point is.. is that sort of evidence even admissible in court? Will the judge even ask to see those screenshots my husband took on his computer? Could it have an affect on our divorce/custody and will I lose custody of my daughter for lying?

[cdad]

As far as evidence. More and more sites like you have mentioned are being thrown into the mix when it involves law suits, companies hiring employees and custody battles. So the base question of can it affect the outcome? Yes and furthermore it can have lasting ramifications well beyond what you can imagine. Once it is posted its on the net it is forever.

[Fr_Chuck]

yes, information you post on web sites can be submitted into evidence. The judge will have to assume the value of them.

The judge will also look at where you get your mail. Where your drivers license is at. Also he may want your boyfriend that you live with to testify not only to you living there, but other home life issues that may include the child. They may want statements from the landlord ( or your ex may demand them(

The ex can of course demand you return back to your home state, since you were not suppose to move out of state with child without his permission.

If he proves you lied to the court, the judge will look poorly on that nad be more likely to give the other party more of what they want

[stinawords]

Because of the popularity of those sites they have been used in court more and more. So, yes it could look bad on your part that you told the judge one thing and had posted another. However, as mentioned above what your drivers license has on it, where you get your mail, and other things like that will also come into play. Not that it will completely erase your lies to the court it could help prove that you were telling the truth while under oath. Providing you were telling the truth.

[JudyKayTee]

I, in fact, search and pull sites when I do background checks. You'd be amazed at the number of people NOT hired because of photos or blogs or whatever.

[stephy8805]

Do I have anything to worry about? My license is a different state and my mail is sent to my home where I live now. So I have that down as far as evidence but my ex husband knows I haven't been honest and he wants to use this stuff against me. How can my husband make me move back to where he lives with my daughter? We've lived here for a yr and a half?

[stephy8805]

I meant to say my daughter is with me and how can husband make us move back when we've lived here for a yr and a half. And what if I just delete my profiles won't that help?

[Laurakr1]

Although it is on your profile it isn't hard evidence. You could argue that you were lying to myspace or Facebook and not to the court. Bottom line being a picture of a computer screen and your status cannot prove much of anything. If there are pictures of you in a city that you said you aren't living that could be a little more incriminating, and yes your ex husband's lawyer is going to make it out to sound like it has sealed your fate, but that's his job. I would change the listing, DON'T LIE ANYMORE, talk in confidence about this with your lawyer, and relax. Your lawyer will have a better idea that I or the rest of us will on how to come back from his accusations.

[Fr_Chuck]

The longer he waited to file, but it is not you he can force to move back, it is the child, you took the child away making his visits harder. So if this had been just a few months after the move, he would have a good chance to get the judge to order either you move back with child, or give him the child.
But he can try this, if he can prove you have lied to him about where you were living, or was hiding from him

[cdad]

do i have anything to worry about? my license is a different state and my mail is sent to my home where i live now. so i have that down as far as evidence but my ex husband knows i havent been honest and he wants to use this stuff against me. how can my husband make me move back to where he lives with my daughter? we've lived here for a yr and a half??

Is where you live now in the same state as the license or is it from where you were before you moved and your driving on an expired license?

[stinawords]

So you have one address on your license and get your mail somewhere else? I'm just trying to get everything straight because you have put yourself in a sticky situation. Did he have a visitation order before you left? That will also make a huge difference.

[stephy8805]

I was issued my drivers license in the state I live now. My husband said he wants to do mediation so neither of us are nailed with expensive attorney fees and not rely on a judge to decide a parenting plan for us.. will my moving away from my husband with our daughter be talked about during mediation by the mediator? I feel like I might lose custody my husband is extremely objective. Like chuck said, I guess me doing what I did has made it difficult for my husband to be a part of our daughters life for a year now. He wants our daughter to live with him primarily and have her go to school and says he will give me as much time as I want with our daughter. Like spring break, snow days, summer, split holidays, he told me I could have her on mothers day and my birthday and then told me he won't go after me for support if I can agree to his offer and said he'll have an open mind for whatever offer I come up with. I'm really worried about how to prepare myself. I want him to have our daughter every other weekend and have her go to school here and he can have our daughter during the summer, spring break, whatever. I know its going to be hard because we live 150 miles apart but I have a great job and a house to provide for our daughter.

[stephy8805]

So you have one address on your license and get your mail somewhere else? I'm just trying to get everything straight because you have put yourself in a sticky situation. Did he have a visitation order before you left? That will also make a huge difference.

Well we initially were going through a divorce but we couldn't afford our attorneys. We had joint custody pretty much 50 50 through court temporarily and never went to mediation before, and I moved before our temp order was dropped because of due process so I moved away after the order dropped. We had a hearing a month and a 1/2 ago and the judge ordered us to go through mediation and our daughter has been with both of us every other week until we come up with a plan.

My lawyer used the uniform child custody and jurisdiction and enforcement act on my husband because our daughter has lived with me for over a year now but we went to my husbands state court... he filed first does that mean my daughters original birth state has jurisdictional rights because he filed before me? My husband argued with me saying were still married and our daughter has lived in her birth state since she was born.

Which is true, things are difficult now since I moved and my husband isn't happy with not seeing our daughter as much as he would have liked... I know what I did was selfish but I didn't want to leave my daughter behind like that. I'm worried about my social profiles not to mention my husband being angry for making his time with our daughter difficult.. I'm afraid a mediator is going to look favorably on my husband without making it obvious!

[JudyKayTee]

Although it is on your profile it isn't hard evidence. You could argue that you were lying to myspace or facebook and not to the court. Bottom line being a picture of a computer screen and your status cannot prove much of anything. If there are pictures of you in a city that you said you arn't living that could be a little more incriminating, and yes your ex husband's lawyer is going to make it out to sound like it has sealed your fate, but thats his job. I would change the listing, DON'T LIE ANYMORE, talk in confidence about this with your lawyer, and relax. Your lawyer will have a better idea that I or the rest of us will on how to come back from his accusations.

I actually work in the legal profession and have seen evidence of this nature brought into Court and used against a person.

I would like to know why you think lying to the Court when this evidence is presented, if this evidence is presented, is a good idea as well as that none of this proves anything.

My experience is to the contrary.

Everyone else has had sound advice and what has been going on, of course, has to stop - now.

[stinawords]

You are right. The mediator might look more favorably on the father. However, they are not a judge. That is where you go to try to work things out so that you don't need a judge to make the decisions. It is still legally binding so you do need to be prepared. Have a list of what you would like to happen with you, as I'm sure he will. If the two of you can't reach a mutual decision then you might have to spend the money on lawyers and go to court. The idea of mediation isn't for the mediator to decide everything it's to allow the two of you to reach an agreement and have it recorded legally the mediator can help. Mediation works a lot of times and sometimes not. It depends more on how quickly you an the father can bend and flex to each others requests.

[stephy8805]

OK so the mediator might look on my daughters father more favorbly because I took her away from him and want him to agree to my own parenting plan that gives him every other weekend? I don't get it... if neither of us come to a decision, does the mediator present to the court what was talked about then? Like what my husband offered and what I offered?

Can I suggest I have sole custody with joint legal? I want my daughter to continue living with me primarily allow her father to have choices with medical/health but not where she will go for school. Is there such thing as a temp parenting plan until our daughter reaches a certain age like elementary?

[stinawords]

Sure there are temp parenting plans but those are generally to last until you get into court or something like that. Go to mediation, see what happens then get back with us because we have already given you about all of the information and help there is. I'm just going to be repeating myself until something new happens. When do you go to mediation? Is it soon?

[stephy8805]

We were supposed to go a few weeks ago but neither of us went. My ex still wants to go to mediation so I guess were tryign again

[JudyKayTee]

New question - why didn't you go? If you are interested in the welfare of your child you MUST take the appropriate steps.

[stephy8805]

Will it make me look bad by not having a job and my husband pays for mediation?