[talaniman]

I am just going to tell you straight, if she could go behind his back she can go behind yours. Just think of what she told you, she likes you both the same, so you can get the same as he got, dumped for another.

How do you even trust her?

[Homegirl 50]

She said she likes you, there are probably a couple of other guys she likes, maybe flirts with, but that does not mean she wants to date you. If she did she would have let you know when she broke up with her boyfriend. But she did tell you she did not want to talk to you for a while. You are not next in line for boy friend.
I told you before I think you have read more into things than are there. You are in the friend zone. She is free for the first time in a couple of years and she is not going to date anyone else right away. She is going to enjoy her freedom and flirt to her hearts content.

[whatisthis3]

Ok so now. Mm she tell me she likes me a lot. Like a lot a lot. She said that she told her exboyfriend that when he comes down, they'd talk it through finally, but she let me know that she was planning to break up with him.
I went to her house the other day, and sparks flew, so we kissed. At first we were confused, maybe that it was too soon.. but we continued to and it got better and better and made out for a couple hours. By the way this was our first.
And she kept promising me that she'd now end things with him for sure
But today, I told her that we should wait for our next kiss until she's not as emotionally involved with him as much anymore so its more special. And she agreed, that we'll wait until she's over the guy. And I asked what happens after she is, and she said we just take steps from there.

So I'm wondering if what I did is right? And what your take on this is? Because I know she likes me a lot, she kept telling me that, and asked if I liked her. And she tells me she misses me a lot.

[amicon]

If she does break up with him,she needs to heal and get over him before starting a new relationship.

Jumping straight into a new relationship is most likely not going to work.

You would be a rebound.

Plus you know that she is,at least emotionally capable of cheating on a boyfriend,so how do you know that you,in case you do get together,could trust her?

[whatisthis3]

That's why she says she's planning not to get into a relationship for the rest of senior year

[Homegirl 50]

I don't doubt that she likes you, but I don't think she is in a hurry to have a boy friend yet.
I also thinks she like to flirt. She likes you enough to make out with you, but she does not want to date. She may have others she's flirting with as well.
I would not put too much stock in her.

[whatisthis3]

Yeah she said part of the reason she broke up with him was cause of me.
She also doesn't want to date cause part of the reason is that itd hurt him so much if he saw she got into a relationship this year after they broke up

[Homegirl 50]

He is still on her mind and in her heart, so you leave her alone until she comes to you.
But don't be hurt if she doesn't

[talaniman]

that's why she says she's planning not to get into a relationship for the rest of senior year

So now she isn't cheating on him, and is free to make out with you, or anyone else until he shows up this summer. Sweet deal. For her at least. And anything that goes wrong will be your fault.

[whatisthis3]

Well she said she promised to break up with him

[talaniman]

She also promised no relationship for senior year. So you got making out, and dating but no title. You okay with that?

[whatisthis3]

Yeah kind of. Is that bad, what usually results

[talaniman]

Hopefully college. That's a deal changer, especially if she goes away, unless someone changes their mind before then.

[whatisthis3]

Like college brings you together? Or apart

[talaniman]

Mostly apart, sorry, but you never know. Why you going to college too?

[whatisthis3]

Yeah. So what's your whole take on the situation? If you don't mind me asking

[Homegirl 50]

I think she will probably mess around with you for a while but she won't formally date you. She will go off to college and then it's good bye, that is if it's not good bye before then

[whatisthis3]

Ehh yeah I don't think it'd be too serious I hope. Its more of a go with the flow thing.
But for now

We talk a lot a lot. Like 24 7. and we flirt, but it's a lot of me flirting, and she flirts back, she doesn't really initiate it a lot. Am I doing something wrong

[Homegirl 50]

You have not listened to what she said anymore than you've listened to the advice given here.
She does not want a relationship and I don't think she is as into you as you are to her.

[talaniman]

I had to spread the rep Homegirl, that's exactly how I see it. She is just going with the flow for now and has a plan of her own that doesn't include him in it.

Maybe that's not a bad thing, but you, Whatisthis3, have a deeper interest in her than she for you. She wants to have fun, with no strings attached and loves your attention, but I hardly think its love, or will grow to that, given your ages, and circumstances. Let me be clear, she has skills and you have fallen for them, so don't get carried away when she feeds your ego.

You have done nothing wrong but followed your heart, while ignoring the facts. You may feel strongly, but that doesn't mean she feels the same way and she has told you that. But you have persisted, and now here we are, with you thinking she will, or does have feelings for you, not as strong and hopeful as yours, but feelings nonetheless.

But, as always happens reality will crush you with the truth, she will move on, as she gets over her break up, and you lose a great date, and make out buddy.

Keep it real, and pay attention closer to what she says, and know that its high hopes of more, that have you waiting for something that may NOT happen. You can enjoy the time, but will be empty when its over, and think she is leading you on, but she isn't. You are allowing yourself to be led.