[venessam]

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and two months and on January he broke up with me because he was tired of us arguing and fighting constantly. We we're both jealous at the time, but now that we've had time a part we've learned from our lessons. We haven't really talked for about a whole month and just recently he apologized and said he missed me and still had feelings for me. The thing is, is that he had a girlfriend during the time we were broken up, but he broke up with her because he wasn't really into her and she was basically just a rebound. It doesn't bother me at al that he dated someone when we were broken up, but I don't know... I want him back also it's just that I'm scared of getting hurt again. He's also just as scared that I might still be jealous and that we might go through the whole argument and fighting again. We're both past the hurting part and we're both talking to other people, but we're just taking things slow right now as friends. He tell's me he misses me occascionally and that he wants to also see me and for the past two weeks we've hung out several times as friends and slowly we've started kissing and cuddling again. What do you guys think about the situation? How should I approach it and is this whole taking it slow thing a good idea?

[amicon]

You need to resolve,in an adult manner,the problems that broke you up in the first place.

Unless you can do that,you probably break up again.

Taking it slow is good,don't just jump back into the relationship.

[neverme]

I agree taking it slow is a good idea but I think you are blurring the lines too much, you are not committed but would both still feel love and affection towards each other.

Yet, it is still viable for either of you to be with someone else, big red flag! Especially considering you both have jealousy issues.

You need to work out the problems you had in your relationship before, to do this you need to be brutally honest with ALL of your feelings. It is the only way you have a chance at making this work.

[dynocompe]

Unless you two are over your jealousyness you will just keeping on going in this circle of fighting and arguing.

So be sure you have a conversation about what boundaries your relationship has, and what you expect from each other.
This can be a great way to solve a lot of problems before they happen again.

[talaniman]

More talking, and listening, and less cuddling, and acting like a couple. I think your only ignoring your differences, instead of solving them.

[toxiccc]

It will be the same as it used to be unless both of you really changed and figured things out. You now just missed each other so everything seems lovely at the moment.

[venessam]

We're still taking this slow right now and we've been talking a lot about things, but he's still scared about some things. We both are talking to and meeting other people but we're not doing anything physical or sexual with them. Do you guy's think that it's a bad idea for us to be doing this with us taking things slow?

[AmericanGirl01]

Make sure you are getting back together with him for the right reasons and not just because it’s the easy thing to do because he is familiar. While familiarity can be comforting, of course, but it is not the secret to success. It is extremely important to make sure that the lines of communication are wide open this time, especially if communication was a problem in the past (jealousy often arises from lack of communication) The two of you need to figure out together what went wrong so that you can work as a team to make sure it does not happen again.

If you are both still in love with each other and you both understand what went wrong last time and are willing to do whatever it takes to ensure it works this time, then I say go for it. Take it slow and be fully prepared for things to not work out.

[venessam]

Lol so do u guys think it won't work out at all?

[neverme]

No one here can tell you whether it will work out, we can try to help you to go into it for the right reasons though.

There are no definites in this life but you make the best decision FOR YOU at the time and basically, let the chips fall where they may.

[Devorameira]

I can guarantee it won't work if you both don't try to make it work. Relationships require effort.