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AmberMarie1 · Feb 6, 2010, 07:00 PM

My brother has three kids. He lives with my grandparents who are in their late 70's. He doesn't have a job. He smokes and uses drugs. He has a 15 year old who is dating a 19 yr old man. A 11 year old he doesn't get to school on time or even part of the time. And a 4 year old who he doesn't tend to. I have asked the cops and schools to step in and cps and no one can do anything because it's all about proof. He drives so loaded Im afraid he's going to crash w the kids in the car. He also hangs around druggies. No one will step in. What can I do? I have tried all the conventional methods. All trying to be anonymous. If my brother found out it was me I would never get to see my niece and nephews again. How can I help them or raise more red flags then I have?I have reported him too to the local PD and they have yet to step in.

AmberMarie1 · Feb 7, 2010, 09:18 AM

This is a very complicated situation and I see very little light at the end of this tunnel. The only time someone will step in will be when something horrible has happened. I see that now.

JudyKayTee · Feb 7, 2010, 10:06 AM

The Police are rather powerless - have you reported him to whatever agency protects children?

Whether he'll ever allow you to see the children again is immaterial - someone should be protecting them and that takes whatever it takes.

AmberMarie1 · Feb 7, 2010, 11:41 AM

Yes I have called and in my area it is rampid. Im hoping the school will do a in house visit over the tardies and absences. It is not immaterial to me rather I see the kids or not. I keep tabs on them with having the ability to be in their lives. I have been in their lives since birth. I have done everything I can do on my end and hopefully with enough calls and his behavior we will be able to get the CPS and PD involved. It's not as easy as you think to get parents in trouble. They have rights and look at from a lawyers view. What can anyone prove. Hope someone can maybe give me some tips on what can be done. Remember I have gone through every agencey here to get help. Should I just wait for someone to step in, because one thing I know is when you are doing wrong you always get caught at some point. All the stories you hear about CPS are not always true. Their cases are 2 feet high of reports on their desks. So they have such a hard time getting to everyone. I have even had a talk with my brother many of times about what I see. Useless is all that is.

AmberMarie1 · Feb 7, 2010, 11:42 AM

Thank you for your responses. I am not trying to be sassy. I am just frustrated with this situation among many other things going on.

JudyKayTee · Feb 7, 2010, 11:50 AM

Originally Posted by AmberMarie1

Thank you for your responses. I am not trying to be sassy. I am just frustrated with this situation among many other things going on.

No, trust me, you don't sound sassy - you wouldn't BELIEVE how hostile people get here. You just sound plain old frustrated.

The only other solution I can think of is to retain an Attorney and let him/her fight this battle on your behalf - Attorneys very often get the attention of people in authority much faster than the rest of us.

AmberMarie1 · Feb 7, 2010, 01:35 PM

That's a great idea! Thank you! Thank you also for your understanding it's been horrible for me because I love those kids like my own. I see an attorney the 16th. He is a family law attorney. Thank you again!

cdad · Feb 7, 2010, 02:17 PM

Where is the mother in all this ?

AmberMarie1 · Feb 8, 2010, 06:47 AM

The mother of the kids is a addict. She is more negligent then my brother as if that could be possible. They have both went to treatment facilities and both came back with no change of heart.

JudyKayTee · Feb 8, 2010, 07:04 AM

I will be off the Board for the next week but please come back and tell us how this plays out.

this8384 · Feb 8, 2010, 07:47 AM

I'm also curious to see how this plays out for you. Like Judy pointed out, it's all about proof.

I can definitely sympathize with you. My two stepchildren had been saying for over a year that they didn't want to live with their mother anymore but when we asked them why, they'd clam up. We found out just this past April when their mother's boyfriend got arrested for domestic violence - their mother is in a destructive relationship but had been forcing the kids to lie about it and hide numerous other things. My husband filed for placement and custody; they came to a temporary agreement in August and the kids have been living with us since the end of July. I truly wish you the best.