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mistiliz · Jan 8, 2010, 11:40 AM

Can someone please tell me how to go about finding adoptive parents, niece, etc... I see post ads and forums about how to find birth parents but not adoptive parents. Its mind bottling here and so deperately wanting to find my niece!

I recently found out that my youngest brother gave up his daughter when he was 16 yrs. Old! This is 26yrs ago! I found birth mom through Facebook and have talked to her. She gave me very little info about the adoption. I have date of birth, adopted name, where she was adopted. She even sent me a picture that she received from adopted parents when she was 2 yrs. Old. Everything else she and my brother blocked out and can't remember.

Any help will be so grateful!

Thank you

JudyKayTee · Jan 9, 2010, 09:46 AM

Have you read this? https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adopti...on-401680.html

Have you searched the various sites to locate people as well as Facebook and similar sites?

Synnen · Jan 9, 2010, 10:59 PM

Please be aware also that she might not know that she is adopted, and that you may be a major disruption to her life if you show up out of nowhere.

Note as well that the ONLY options that you have to search, because you are not part of the adoption triad, are through a licensed private detective or through reunion websites. You cannot go to the adoption agency or courthouse as the biological aunt--no one would give you information. You MAY be able to leave your information with the adoption agency, but that's going to vary from agency to agency.

Is there any particular reason YOU are the one looking, and not your brother?

mistiliz · Jan 10, 2010, 12:05 AM

My brother is not knowledgeable like we are. My husband was adopted and we were able to find his Bparents.

I want to find the adoptive parents of my niece FIRST so there won't be any disruption(if she doesn't know).

JudyKayTee · Jan 10, 2010, 08:05 AM

And my feeling is - upon rereading this as well as Synnen's answer - that if the biological mother did not want to give OP info the mother (at least) wants this to remain closed.

I also am not sure that the adoptive parents want to hear from the natural family.

Again, the "post info" sites are probably the way to go - see if anyone with similar info responds.

My feeling is that if the brother/father wanted the family to know this info the "secret" would have been "out" a long time ago.