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Ronnoc2 · Oct 22, 2009, 05:09 AM

I'm 15 years old, and I've recently outed myself as gay. There's this guy who I've been friends with for four years. He's helped me through a lot of stuff, including my outing, and I've helped him through quite a bit too. We're very close, and he knows I'm gay.
For the past two years I've had an insatiable and intense crush for him. Two years of staring at him longingly when he's not looking, two years of secretely enjoying it when we play-wrestle at shool or at his house.

Of course, a few months ago I decided to tell him about this. I told him how I felt and he told me 'I'm fine with it dude, you can't help it.' Of course, this was a lie. He became deathly quiet with me the following week, and when I asked what was up, he told me 'he felt awkward being around a guy who liked him'. Of course, I quickly lied and told him that I didn't have feelings for him any more to salvage a very good relationship (we're best friends you see.)

He still thinks there's nothing going on, but I still like him so much. It's almost painful how much I like him, and it makes me physically ill to know that I like someone so much, but they will never, ever like me back. And even worse, there are literally no gay guys where I live who I can go out with to take my mind of things.

I just want this to end, to stop this stupid, irrevokable crush on this guy so I can concentrate on school studies, and just being a good friend for him. How can I do this? Any tips or advice would be appreciated greatly.

adam_89 · Oct 22, 2009, 07:34 AM

Try doing anything you can to keep your mind off him. Try limiting your time with him. You never know who might be gay at your school. They might just not be out of the closet like yourself. Have you ever had any connections with guys before or anything? I am just wondering how you label yourself as being gay but have never been around another gay person or experienced anything with a guy before. So you think you might be gay which could be bi-curious. You are at a young age and may not know what you want. You could grow out of the stage as well, you never know.

Ronnoc2 · Oct 22, 2009, 07:51 AM

I've had experiences with guys before, including holding hands, kissing with and without tongue, and slightly more, er, serious stuff (but not sex, I'm not willing to do something illegal). And yeah, I could grow out of it, you never know do you?

And I have tried limiting my time with him, but it's so hard. We have a lot in common, I mean -alot-, and he goes to my school and is part of my social group. Every time I try and avoid him, I'm always drawn to him, and it never really works. :S

adam_89 · Oct 22, 2009, 07:56 AM

Well if he is not attracted to him the same way then just keep it to yourself. You don't want to ruin the good relationship you have as friends. You almost lost him once and that was bad wasn't it? If you have strong feelings for him then maybe you shouldn't be friends with him so your urges aren't uncontrollable or maybe you can convince him to experiment with you. Ya know just maybe a one time thing to see if he likes it.