[Liana Neff]

So I'm in the 7th grade. 12 right now turning 13. Last year my mother was put in a facility for unstable health. She was in there for about six weeks. During that time I had no one to talk to about it. I couldn't tell my friends, they would tease me about it. So I kept to myself. Now my mom is back but, she very unstable right now. I'm turning into a teenager and having a bunch of trouble with school, and I get mad at my mom and yell at her. I know I'm not suppose to but I get sooo angry. Then my dad yells at me for yelling at her. Every one thinks that since I didn't show any sighs of emotion to my mother while she was gone, and because I'm so independent, they all think I'm OK. But I'm really not! I cry a lot, and no one's there to help me understand any of it and I have no idea what to do!

[N0help4u]

You are going to have to be strong and independent and learn how to cope. You see that yelling at your mom works against you so you need to figure out HOW to get through and communicate in a more productive way.

Can you talk to your dad? A school counsellor?

[Cat1864]

Liana, as you already know it isn't going to be easy. Sometimes, we forget how much someone who seems strong needs support to stay strong.

It sounds like you have been yelling for help and no one is listening. Time to try a different tactic like the one you used here. Asking for help.

Nohelp4u has mentioned your father and school counselors.

I can understand why you might not want to approach him first, but he really needs to know why you have been acting like you have. If you (both of you) can sit down and discuss (that means listening as well as talking) what has been happening maybe you can find ways to relieve some of the stress. Maybe you can ask your father to help you find a counselor or support group for both of you.

School counselors: at the best they may be able to let you sit down and get your feelings out. At the very least, they should be able to direct you to support groups in your area. A trusted teacher can also be a source of information and understanding if they know what you are dealing with at home.

Your friends might surprise you if you do open up to the ones who are closest to you. Don't let yourself push those friends away because you are afraid of how they might react.

There are very few things that can stand strong without having a good support system. Humans are not among them.

[VSESSAH]

Right now act as normal as you can in school. You are at the age where teenagers can be very cruel and nobody is going to feel sorry for you. So don't go around telling people and acting sad but be the most responsible person you can ever be. Be a great friend and think positive. Karma will get at you for doing this and your life is going to guide itself. As for your mom Your going to yell and you know what you can't help it. She prob does something that you would never do if you had a kid but she does it and you can get so angry and you just feel it in your gut. Its like your going to burst because your thinking what the heck your suppose to be my mother and your acting like a idiot. Its almost like your more responsible then she is... like you feel like you could be her mother. Well anyway if you end up yelling at her and cusing her out then you feel remorse to yourself and can't help it. Just start by paying no attention to her. It took me till I was in my 20's to learn this. My mom is so mentally screwed she has never been there one day of my life. I could be standing there with a bullet wound in my chest and she would complain about what a bad day she was having. I remember in school all I wanted was a normal life so I started to pretend it was normal. The hardest part was never being taught how to do things or I had problems with affection. I know I could hug a stranger but if my mom hugged me (till this day) just plain awkward.

I can go on and on and Im sorry for jumping around a lot. Its just when it comes to this subject I could go on for ever and ever. The best feeling is when you do the right thing and become someone or something your family isn't and tell them your background. Its awesome to hear how you turned out all right and how tough you are and strong. Even though you may be sensitive and insecure etc etc. You will attract good friends and they will be your family. You will be taken care of I promise and feel free to ask me anything I have been there done that and I'm finally seeing the sunshine after the storm. But I made a choice. Vanessa