[Jake2008]

You are still thinking 'couple' and 'relationship', and there is none.

I know you expected to hear exactly what you've heard. That she is a user, and you fell for it to the tune of probably thousands of dollars. She's cheated on you more times to count, and keeps you dangling on the end of a string- just in case she wants something from you.

For heaven's sake, her mother owes you money now??

I don't know why you are so naïve, and blind to what is happening to you. You ignore all the obvious signs, and justify her very bad behaviour, and you're continuously looking to justify the smallest detail, and explain away her behaviour.

Instead of concentrating on all the negativity and emotional abuse she throws your way, why not think instead of the positive qualities you obviously possess, that you can bestow upon another woman, who would appreciate and cherish you back. Love isn't about taking, it's about giving.

You are gentle, kind and generous. You are a good catch!! You're romantic and sensitive to the needs of others, and you care enough to put their needs first. You give, far more than you receive. You are loyal, faithful, and true to your values.

Now turn the above paragraph around, and pretend that is what you are looking for in a woman. And, I'm sure if you really think about it, you can add more.

So, if you have what you have now, and you could have what you know you could- isn't it time to cut your losses and move on?

[N0help4u]

I know you say she loved you but even users can love someone in their own messed dysfunctional sort of way but you need to do better for yourself. Someday you will look back and think ''What did I ever really see in her anyway'' Great times but better will come along later.

[talaniman]

A rant, or vent is very understandable, but being a big wuss, is not. Man up buddy, you have been had big time, and to go back to them, and bend over so her, and her family, can put more boots up your a$$, is not acceptable either. Cry for your loss, but don't go back for more of the same.

[jhenderson_90]

Lol all my buddies say that, they're like "dude, grow a pair of balls, she used you til you were bone dry, now she is ignoring you and not taking you back, why do you care about someone who treated you like that"

I did have a question though. What is going through her mind when she calls me from her blocked number, and I ignore her now? Will that bug her, or will it be nothing?

I got a blocked call the other night but I ignored it, never got another call back... will it begin to bug her if she see's I'm not talking to her? Or if at church, I meet a new girl maybe?

[N0help4u]

It will bug her that you are not giving her the upper hand.
It will bug her that she sees that maybe you are not the easy going guy that will take her back so easily.

Don't worry what is going through her mind though.

I have a saying that goes " I know I have something to worry about when I can figure out what is going through their mind''
Meaning you are better off not stooping to their thought level.

[talaniman]

Who cares what it does to her?? Worry about what your doing for yourself. That's what counts.

[jhenderson_90]

I just found out...

She has a new boyfriend already :(

2 weeks after she said she loved me and I got her a dress and bra and everything :(

Eff my life...


Literally I feel like my heart just got ripped out once again.

Our one year is August 26th and she already has a new boyfriend.
I can't believe this.

All the intimate stuff we did, she will do with another guy now. God I want to just die now I hate this

[jhenderson_90]

Its so weird, I have not cried tonight, I am more in a state of shock and disbelief than I am depressed. How could she do this to me I keep thinking, why is she in a new relationship already??


Is this the rebound guy? Does this mean my ex really does have feelings for me still and she is trying to get over me? But it will fail because she will see that the other guy has more flaws than me?

I already broke no contact with her unfortunately, earlier I emailed her saying "congrats on your new boyfriend, thats good your moving on, just dont give yourself up so easily to him unless you know he really loves you like i did, take care, i know me talking to you pushes you away more so i'll keep this email short, bye"

Seriously what are the charactersitics of a rebound relationship already?? I don't get it, is it more good news or more bad news for me, does she still care then and is trying to put all her feelings aside that I didn't talk to her all week?

Or... is she one of those girls who can't be alone, she always has to feel loved or something. Please help, I feel so alone and used...

[girlsrule13]

Isn't this illegal. A 17 year old, and a 19 year old?

[Jake2008]

She's starting a new relationship already because she's only 17 years old.

She is at an age where that's what 17 year olds do. They go from boyfriend to boyfriend, and along the way hopefully learn what they need to know, so that when the time comes for them to want a serious relationship, they have a clue or two.

Talkling about the 'rebound guy' or new boyfriend, and how it happened and why, and what it means, could have as many meanings as Elvis has sequens. You could drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out, and even if you did, it wouldn't mean anything anyway.

You are still thinking that you have some stake in how she thinks and behaves. You don't. She is free to do as she pleases. You no longer have a relationship with her, and now you know that she has a new boyfriend, and the last person she's thinking about now, is you.

It is painful to break up when you don't want to, or when you don't see the reasons for it, didn't see it coming, or can't understand it. Trying to understand it particularly is impossible.

This hurt you have will ease with time. I think for your sake that it's a good thing she made the decision for you to move on, because you wouldn't have likely done it yourself. I know that's just my opinion, and you are living with the pain right now, but you will be okay.

I hope that eventually you will find someone that you can trust.

[sweet1028]

Basically over the past year this girl has tried to have her cake and eat it too. She wants you as her chips on the side that she can go to once the cake hits the floor with another guy.

You deserve so much more in a relationship than this. She is a young girl, she is not ready for the commitment that she feels is coming from the relationship that you two had. She cheated on you way too many times for you to put up with.

I hope that you can realize that no contact whatsoever means no contact with family, her friends, and most definitely not her. Who cares that she has a new boyfriend? You need to find you a woman! Not a girl, who doesn't know what she wants in life right now! Good Luck in moving on in your life and relationships =)

[jhenderson_90]

I just woke up and I'm still in a state of 'wow this happened to me'

I still don't get it :( I don't think I ever will.
I ignore her for a week, when we talked Monday she was worried I was talking to another girl and now she has a boyfriend.


Is there any good that can come out of a situation like that, does it show she still cares somewhat and is having a hard time getting over me? Do most women regret their rebound relationships after they dated a pretty awesome guy for a long term?

[N0help4u]

NO it doesn't show she cares
It is I don't want him and nobody else can have him either because I am jealous
BUT I can go with who ever I want.

[jhenderson_90]

Ugh just so much bad stuff is happening and now I have no one to be there by my side.
In the past month and a half:

Broken hand
Alternator goes bad in car 1
Car 2 engine fries up
Dad has to have back surgery/ could be crippled for good
My job is laying off people
Car 1 engine goes out on me last night, walked 9 miles home.
Found out the ex has a new boyfriend
My mom just left my dad.


Okay so sorry I'm so upset about this girl having a new boyfriend and suddenly just forgetting one year's worth of memories with me, but it's the fact I'm fending for myself now with all these problems and no money to take care of them.

[ZoeMarie]

I'm so sorry to hear all that. I've gone through many things at once like that too. Hang in there. We're here to talk to whenever you need us. So do you have a car 2?

[kctiger]

J life is hard at times but we have all been there and will be there again. I am sorry life sucks at the moment but have faith it does better. I think the emotional toll of the break up and her having a new boyfriend is sort of making everything else seem worse than it is.

Relax, take some time for yourself, get your life situated and get better. Good luck!

[jhenderson_90]

It definatley is making everything worse than it is.

Want to know what just happened this morning.
My mom walked out on my dad, she wants a divorce now. Its like all this stuff keeps piling ontop of one another, and I keep remembering that she is off doing stuff with another guy now, while I got all this stuff going on in my life with no one to help me or be by side.


I hope karma is real. It needs to come back and bite my ex in the butt big time. She gave up something so great to her, I did everything, and she throws it all away like nothing.

[N0help4u]

You have to sort out what you can deal with from everything you have no control over and work from there
You know the serenity prayer

God, give us grace to accept with serenity
The things that cannot be changed,
Courage to change the things
Which should be changed,
And the Wisdom to distinguish
The one from the other.

Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,

[jhenderson_90]

What are the odds she comes back to me?
People are telling me this is a rebound to get over me, but she will realize that she misses me more than gets over me?

Any truth to this?

[N0help4u]

People aren't her. They may just be saying that to comfort you or get your hopes up
If you want to wait then wait but don't really expect anything. Take care of your problems in the meantime and let the chips fall where they are going to.