[frustrated77]

Help me PLEASE!! I am 29 yrs old, my boyfriend is 27. Two weeks ago he moved in with me, this was a HUGE step for him as he is a very private person and has never lived with a girlfriend before. We have been together for over 2 yrs. I know the password to his e-mail account and he HAS NO IDEA that I know this. Checked it today to find a message from him to his female co-worker saying that he wished they could kiss again and that he finds "everything" about her "stunning" and how he wants to make love to her. I should add that she is a married woman with kids... she replys to his e-mails saying that she always thinks of him and she wishes they could talk more. This is not the first time I have found suspiciuos things on his computer, 1/2 naked pics and such of other women, women's underwear that he claims he has had for yrs... etc... The question is... what should I do. I know that if I don't confront him it will eat me alive, but I don't want to wait too long. Problem is, I know how mad he will be at me for invading his privacy. I am very ashamed of that but I wouldn't feel the need to do that if it weren't for my past experiences with him. HELP!

~Frustrated~:confused:

[talaniman]

You've had these red flags waving in your face for sometime and you still allowed him to move in with you?? You've swallowed his bait hook line and sinker and your frustrated as to what to do. How about showing him the door , there is no trust or respect between you and you will be going downhill after you confront him and rightfully so. This is not a healthy relationship and will die in misery and pain. Sorry just my take on it.

[Wildcat21]

Yes - massive red flags.

Trust completely broken.

Yes - time to show him the door. This won't get better anytime soon.

Liar, chaeter.

My old saying - once a cheater, always a cheater + with a MARRIED WOMAN no less. Yuck!!

Yes extremely unhealthy - extremely unhealthy for you to hang on to it.

Move on - find a guy you can trust. This guy is kind of a sicko in my book - moves in with you and is kissing a married women? Of course he's private - lots to hide!!

Look in the dictionary under scumbag - his picture is there.

[Wildcat21]

You confront him TODAY let us know how it goes - get ready for the biggest line of bull you've ever seen.

[s_cianci]

You've got some important red flags here. How you got access to his e-mail password without his knowledge notwithstanding, the fact that you "wouldn't feel the need to do that if it weren't for your past experiences with him" speaks volumes. You've been living together for 2 weeks and have been together for over 2 years. By your own admission he is a "very private person" (which makes it all the more amazing how you got access to his password without his knowledge.) Although I don't condone snooping and using someone's password without their authorization, by your own admission you felt a need to do so. It doesn't sound like there's much trust here and, consequently, no potential for a successful relationship. He obviously doesn't want to be monogamous and is even willing to fool with someone else's wife. I think the handwriting's on the wall here. You know the answer as well as I do. You need to find a tactful way to ask him to move back out (assuming that you don't want him to know that you snooped.) If you don't care about that, then you don't need to worry about the tactful part.

[Wildcat21]

This relationship is done.

She's known him 2 years and "he's a very private person".?

He's private because he has a ton to hide!!

Run!!

[Skell]

Confront him and kick him out.

There is no hope here for this relationship to work.

How could you ever trust him again?