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jsu0272n · Aug 4, 2009, 09:36 PM

So I was with a woman for six years a few months ago we decided to go our separate ways it was a very painful situation for me, but I have now began getting really close to a long time friend that I have always kind of had a crush on she is perfect for me we really click on all levels I'm extremely turned on by her but when it was finally time for sex I could not maintain an erection!! Even after much encouragement it just wasn't happening.. there's eefinately the right chemistry between us I am kind of intimidated by her because she is extremely beautiful but I think it was just nerves my friend said that I probably just have been with the same girl for a long time so its very difficult for me to just go into sex with someone else because I only feel comfortable with sex in a committed long-term relationship... any ideas or thoughts or recommendations would be appreciated:confused:

Gemini54 · Aug 4, 2009, 09:57 PM

One word - relax.

You've just finished a long term relationship a couple of months ago and I imagine you're still in the throes of processing that.

Give it time and don't go jumping into a new relationship just because you think she's 'the one'. She may be, she may not. Give it time.

Finish processing the old, painful stuff before you begin with the new. Your body/mind is telling you too much too soon.

jsu0272n · Aug 5, 2009, 08:37 AM

Originally Posted by Gemini54

One word - relax.

Your body/mind is telling you too much too soon.

I think this is probably the most likely scenario.

bronzebabe · Aug 5, 2009, 09:22 AM

Gemini is 100% right. Relax. It'll happen when it happens. No worries.

danb73 · Aug 5, 2009, 02:00 PM

I agree. I have had the same problem in the past. Even if you feel comfortable physically and everything seems right, there's something going on subconsciously. This can be frustrating for both of you, but if you give it some time, things will work out. No need to run to the doctor for a Viagra prescription. ;)

Ralphie4you · Aug 5, 2009, 09:06 PM

I would probably say that your rushing into the relatioship too quickly. You have past emotions that are effecting the person your with. Even though your no longer dating the old girlfriend, your body might feel that you still are. Soo your body might feel our cheating on your old girlfriend with the new one. I know it doesn't make sense and its hard to agree with but I heard this same explanation from a psychiatrist. Once you no longer have any emotional attachment to your old girlfriend then you can move on to your new girlfriend. You have to be ready to move on and commit yourself 100% to your new girlfriend