[meyesaw kassa]

I love this girl.yes I do. I am in sight love with this girl for four months before my friends and her friends give me the encouragement to talk to her. We talk about 1 hr and tell her my feelings and she told me that for the moment she is ready only for normal friendship and I accept her proposal for the mere reason of not losing her. This has been two weeks ago. We meet on telephone after that but every time I ask her to meet me in person she is giving me a hard time and say that "one day we meet". What should I do?

[N0help4u]

Keep being friends and quit asking to go out or meet you it could work against you if she is not ready. She could feel you are pressuring her and she can't handle pressure.
Especially do not come off sounding or acting desperate, needy or clingy.

[jenniepepsi]

You definitely seem like your coming off as the 'stalker' or 'controlling' type. A huge turn off.

Relax. Slow down. Go at her pace. Something I always tell couples is 'one of you is a fast mover, the other is a slow mover, always go at the slowest pace'

[HelpinHere]

I'd like to add:

There is no such thing as "love at first sight". There is, a less commonly accepted, but more realistic, "lust at first sight"

You cannot truly love someone you do not know. Until you realize that, you will always think more of this girl than there is because you have convinced yourself that there is more. I have learned this the hard way, and I'm just telling you so maybe you won't have to.

[I wish]

You don't even know this girl very well and she barely knows you and you already tell her how you feel?

She already told you that she just wants to be friends. So that's a clear sign that she wants to slow things down. Just respect her wishes, otherwise you will just push her away even more.

[MissRissa]

Just take it slow and give her some space. There could be many reasons she is doing that. When she's ready to meet you in person she will. Just don't force it on her.

[roxypox]

You have already gotten a lot of great advice, but I'm still going to throw my 2 cents into it.

1.This girl has agreed upon being friends. If you want her in your life this is the first thing that should be respected.

2. If you come on to strongly, you might scare her away.

3. I agree with helpinhere; this is lust at first sight. Love requires time to grow and you can't love someone you don't know (like the others have pointed out)

Personally I just dated a guy for a few weeks who fell in love with me after 3 weeks, he also professed his love for me after 3 weeks. Personally that didn't scare me of as much as him thinking that he knew me when he didn't know me at all!

When getting to know this girl, do things in the pace she sets... if she wants to take it slow... take it slow, and take your time getting to know her. You are not in a hurry!

[JudyKayTee]

[QUOTE=roxypox;1866696]personally I just dated a guy for a few weeks who fell in love with me after 3 weeks, he also professed his love for me after 3 weeks. Personally that didn't scare me of as much as him thinking that he knew me when he didn't know me at all![QUOTE]


Had to throw this in - and we had both been married and divorced for some time BUT my late husband asked me to marry him on our first date. I thought he was crazy. We married after about 8 weeks and EVERYBODY thought we were crazy. We had a good, solid, happy marriage until he died.

I would NOT recommend this for anyone/everyone - but sometimes it works.

If someone would tell me this story I would say she was crazy.

[N0help4u]

3. I agree with helpinhere; this is lust at first sight. Love requires time to grow and you can't love someone you don't know (like the others have pointed out)

personally I just dated a guy for a few weeks who fell in love with me after 3 weeks, he also professed his love for me after 3 weeks. Personally that didn't scare me of as much as him thinking that he knew me when he didn't know me at all!

Often too people THINK they know you because
They see you the way they imagine you and want to fit you into THEIR image of who they think you are

[roxypox]

Often too people THINK they know you because
they see you the way they imagine you and want to fit you into THEIR image of who they think you are

Oh yeah, I totally agree with that! I def think that this is the case for some people. Love your take on it BTW!


as for this guy, He had a crush on me in HS as it turned out and thought that I was def the woman of his dreams... sadly the people who LOOK like the person we dream about doesn't come with a clean slate and a personality that can be filled in :p the result was that he kept being shocked when he saw new sides of me...

Judy: my cousin and her hubby was like that, they met and from early on they wanted to get married, and at the end of may they got married. Although it wasn't as quick as you and your x-hubby. My Cousin and her hubby had been together for a year. But I do think its rare!