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ned123 · Jul 12, 2009, 03:43 AM

I am 16 years old and 4 months pregnant. I live in California.
The father of the baby is 17. After the baby is born the father said he was going to attempt to get sole custody and have him and his parents raise the baby. They are also planning on moving to Arizona.
I would like for both of us to be in the child's life, but he is set on making sure I never see it. He made this choice after an argument and is not changing his mind. I know if it came down for just me or for just him to have sole custody of the child I would be the better choice. What all can I do? And what rights or anything do I have?

N0help4u · Jul 12, 2009, 03:46 AM

He would have to prove that you are unfit and can not at all afford to raise the baby. Do you have parents that will help you and back you up if he takes you to court?
He can not just simply take the baby and move off to another state. Him moving to another state is also in your favor.

ned123 · Jul 12, 2009, 03:50 AM

Originally Posted by N0help4u

He would have to prove that you are unfit and can not at all afford to raise the baby. Do you have parents that will help you and back you up if he takes you to court?
He can not just simply take the baby and move off to another state. Him moving to another state is also in your favor.

Yah, my parents would back me up. I'm pretty sure we're more secure finacially too.

ScottGem · Jul 12, 2009, 04:43 AM

First, as the father he does have rights. But the odds of him getting sole custody, especially if he plans to move away are slim to none.

If you want to shut him up tell him that if he doesn't act more reasonably, you will charge him with statutory rape and he will go through life with a sex offender tag. As it is, he might still be charged since the hospital or your obgyn might be required to report it. Under CA Penal Code SEction 261-269 sexual intercourse with anyone under 18 is statutory rape. Because there is less than a 3 year gap its only a misdemeanor. But it's a slam dunk case. You are pregnant and under 18. Therefore the father is guilty of statutory rape.

And, if he is found guilty, there is a good chance you can block his visitation.

N0help4u · Jul 12, 2009, 05:03 AM

California is behind on that one... usually in most cases they are the more liberal state.

■California - The age of consent in California is 18. It is illegal for anyone to engage in sexual intercourse with a minor (someone under the age of 18), unless they are that person's spouse. California employs a tiered system where the greater the difference in age, the greater the penalty. If the person engaging in sex with a minor is less than 3 years older or younger than the minor, then they are guilty of a misdemeanor. If they are more than 3 years older than the minor then they are guilty of a felony. Those over the age of 21 engaging in sex with those under 16 are subjected to more harsh penalties.

http://www.legalmatch.com/law-librar...f-consent.html

ScottGem · Jul 12, 2009, 05:09 AM

Yep, the age of consent set at 18 did surprise me. But the law is clear. The father IS guilty of misdemeanor statutory rape.

s_cianci · Jul 12, 2009, 06:20 AM

As a 17-year-old his rights are very limited as far as seeking sole custody for himself and initiating other legal actions on his own behalf. And I can assure you that no judge in the country would grant sole custody to a 17-year-old father nor to his parents. You both have rights and responsibilities as parents. As the mother and the pregnant one you have leverage. As the colloquial saying goes "possession is 9/10 of the law." Not that any legal professional would outright admit it but that is definitely the precedent that's practiced when it comes to matters of family law. Not that that gives you the power to deny him his paternal rights or him the power to evade his paternal obligations, because it doesn't, but I honestly think you have little to worry about .

s_cianci · Jul 12, 2009, 06:22 AM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

First, as the father he does have rights. But the odds of him getting sole custody, especially if he plans to move away are slim to none.

If you want to shut him up tell him that if he doesn't act more reasonably, you will charge him with statutory rape and he will go through life with a sex offender tag. As it is, he might still be charged since the hospital or your obgyn might be required to report it. Under CA Penal Code Section 261-269 sexual intercourse with anyone under 18 is statutory rape. Because there is less than a 3 year gap its only a misdemeanor. But its a slam dunk case. You are pregnant and under 18. Therefore the father is guilty of statutory rape.

And, if he is found guilty, there is a good chance you can block his visitation.

Yep. This is your ace in the hole right here. Do it!

JudyKayTee · Jul 12, 2009, 08:06 AM

Originally Posted by s_cianci

As a 17-year-old his rights are very limited as far as seeking sole custody for himself and initiating other legal actions on his own behalf. And I can assure you that no judge in the country would grant sole custody to a 17-year-old father nor to his parents. You both have rights and responsibilities as parents. As the mother and the pregnant one you have leverage. As the colloquial saying goes "possession is 9/10 of the law." Not that any legal professional would outright admit it but that is definitely the precedent that's practiced when it comes to matters of family law. Not that that gives you the power to deny him his paternal rights or him the power to evade his paternal obligations, because it doesn't, but I honestly think you have little to worry about .

Please post your source for what I have placed in bold print.

stinawords · Jul 12, 2009, 08:59 AM

The only problem I see with the whole rape thing is that he too is under 18. I know it is rare (very rare at that) he could also charge her with statutory rape. I have in fact seen it done with the guy being the victom and winning. Granted she is younger and the female so generally people only look at her to be the victom and in the case I saw the guy was sixteen or seventeen and the girl was a year older.

stevetcg · Jul 12, 2009, 09:19 AM

Originally Posted by stinawords

The only problem I see with the whole rape thing is that he too is under 18. I know it is rare (very rare at that) he could also charge her with statutory rape. I have in fact seen it done with the guy being the victom and winning. Granted she is younger and the female so generally people only look at her to be the victom and in the case I saw the guy was sixteen or seventeen and the girl was a year older.

Pretty sure that if he pressed statutory rape charges against her he would be laughed out of the DA's office. But give it a shot... prosecutors can always use a good laugh...

stinawords · Jul 12, 2009, 09:54 AM

Originally Posted by stevetcg

Pretty sure that if he pressed statutory rape charges against her he would be laughed out of the DA's office. But give it a shot... prosecutors can always use a good laugh...

I'm not saying that he will win that type of case against her but just pointing out that it isn't always a slam dunk in the girls favor either.