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    thephoenix's Avatar
    thephoenix Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 29, 2009, 06:55 AM
    Having trouble with my best friend
    Hi I am
    justcurious55's Avatar
    justcurious55 Posts: 4,360, Reputation: 790
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    #2

    Jun 29, 2009, 10:01 AM

    We kind of need some details if you want advice. Trouble with your best friend could be one of a million things.
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #3

    Jun 29, 2009, 10:25 AM

    Hey,what kind of trouble?
    And if you want to say,your age group.

    Thanks.
    thephoenix's Avatar
    thephoenix Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Jun 30, 2009, 07:28 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by justcurious55 View Post
    we kinda need some details if you want advice. trouble with your best friend could be one of a million things.
    Well I am 17 and my best friends 18 and he is engaged to be married me and this all started a while back so I giving a summary, his fiancé use to be really good friends and they both would tell me things and when they both fight they both come to me for advice and the first few times it was OK then this became a weekly thng and he made me promise that if she told him something that could be bad that I would tell him so I did and this went on for a while and I guess that one day they got into a bad fight and he told her everything I told her so after that me and his fiancé didn't talk that much which I got over then after a while she would start getting more controlling and he would become love blind she litteraly be controlling and I would try to be nice to her and supporth her but she wouldn't want me any where near them even when I was invited to his house for special occasians she wouldn't want me there and then they start getting into bad fights and because I would hang out with him I mean he was I only close friend and most of the time I really wouldn't see him she would tell him that I was taking his attention away from her and she wanted him to give up all his friends just so they can be together all the time so after a while the fight would get worse to the point where he stayed the night at my house and he got so mad at her he broke my phone so the he started cheating on his fiancé with his ex girlfriend and then he mess around with this other girl which now there girlfriend and boyfriend behind his fiancé s back and he told her he loved her,so his fiancé sent me hate mail the first time saying I get in the way of them and for me not to ever talk to her again and I tried and tried to be nice and do nice things for her but she always put me down and I knew he wasn't that happy so I told him he should brake up if he doesn't changed and he was going to do it so when I got home I slept and I woke up later around 2 am and she sent a message saying quote
    You ruined my relationship. I hate you for it. To be honest, I can't wait till you leave, and I hope you never come back. If u were a true friend to ernesto you wouldve never gotten in the way of us. But now he and I are not together. And you ed that up. I have no sympathy for you. Karma will catch up to you for ruining my life. May God bless you, you need it SO out of anger I wrote this to her YOU WANT TO BLAIME SOME ONE BLAIME YOURSELF IF YOU Weren't SUCH A STUCK UP JEALOUS CONTROLLLING THEN MAYBE I HAVE SYMPATHY FOR YOU I NEVER GOT IN YOUR WAY AND ALL I DID WAS Want to HANG OUT WITH MY FRIEND JUST BECAUSE YOU DUMPED ALL YOUR FRIENDS Don't FORCE IT ON OTHERS YOUR KARMA HAS COME BACK TO YOU AND YOU HAVE TO REAP WHAT YOU SEW AND ITS YOU WHO NEEDS PRAYER BECAUSE You're a Hypocrite AND YOU LL NEVER SUCCEDD AS LONG AS YOU PUT OTHERS DOWN I VE SEE HOW TRULLY UGLY YOU REALLY ARE AND YOU VE RUINED YOURSELF QUIT BLAMING OTHERS FOR IT ESPECIALLY A ME BLAIME Yourself BACK OFF OR YOU'LL PAY
    AND I AM NOT LIKE SELENA ILL SHOW YOU HOW MUCH OF AN HOLE I CAN BE
    Don't freaking RIGHT BACK
    AND MAY GOD FORGIVE YOU YOU NEED IT TORI
    And after that he wrote me this I've told youcountless times to not say anything ti victoria... 1;that means you don't respect my word... 2;i've always told you that if you don't have anything to say, don'tsay anything at all, you can take my advice on anything else except when it comes to victoria... 3; I trusted you not to have any cumunications with victoria, you boke my trust... 4;by doing all this you've hurt me so badly, brother, best friend, friends, not even people you know do that to each other, what you did was what a enemy would do... 5;this was my relationship, you came into it by saying what you said, and you did really big damage... don't think I'm blaming only you... now bothe of you made me look like a hypicrit, I don't know what m going to do about her yet but don't think that you need to know... you've taken the first steps to making us enemies, I would never do the same to you, so instead of hating you, I will stop everything... im so so sorry man but I didn't do this.im <http://this.im> a man of my word and my word is that we will not talk and we will not hate... if have anyrespect for me left you will not talk to either one of victoria and I... sorry but bye ryan :(
    I was hurt and we talked and I guess it going to take time for I apologize for what I said but
    And he forgave me the problem is that he said we have to be friends behind his girlfriends back and he hardly ever calls and I am hurt :( badly and we call every now and then twice a week and he said he'll still be there but not as much and the other day he called me and now he wants me to help him cheat again on his girlfriend and fiancé with another chick he likes is this right please help me what should I do ?
    justcurious55's Avatar
    justcurious55 Posts: 4,360, Reputation: 790
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    #5

    Jun 30, 2009, 09:52 AM

    Wow. With friends like that who needs enemies? While it was inappropriate for you to tell him (ernesto?) things that she (victoria, right?) told you in confidence, I would say the first wrong was him asking you to do so. It had to have been awkward enough for you to be caught in the middle of their fights without him having you tell him what she was saying. And now to have them blame you for the faults of their relationship after they're the ones you stuck you in that position. Ugh! Sounds like the real problem was the lack of trust and communication they had. I'd find some new friends if I were you. And learn from this mistake. Married, engaged, men with gf's are just best to stay away from. Even if your intentions are good, the women their attached to generally don't like it. And next time you've got two people fighting coming to you, there's nothing wrong with saying "i don't want to be caught in the middle. i think you guys should work this out on your own."
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
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    #6

    Jul 1, 2009, 01:36 AM
    I found your post almost impossible to read because you've never heard of punctuation. That's not how people talk, why would they read like that?

    Anyway, if these are your best friends, I'd hate to see your enemies!

    Lesson number one - don't ever get between couples - let them fight their own fights and keep confidences.

    Lesson number two - don't play people against each other - as you can see, you're the one that will suffer the consequences in the end.

    Lesson number three - don't ever help anyone be dishonest. If they want to cheat, that's their choice and you should not be complicit in it.

    Lesson number four - get new friends, get a new social group - you'll be a lot happier.
    thephoenix's Avatar
    thephoenix Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Jul 1, 2009, 04:31 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by justcurious55 View Post
    wow. with friends like that who needs enemies? while it was inappropriate for you to tell him (ernesto?) things that she (victoria, right?) told you in confidence, i would say the first wrong was him asking you to do so. it had to have been awkward enough for you to be caught in the middle of their fights without him having you tell him what she was saying. and now to have them blame you for the faults of their relationship after they're the ones you stuck you in that position. ugh! sounds like the real problem was the lack of trust and communication they had. i'd find some new friends if i were you. and learn from this mistake. married, engaged, men with gf's are just best to stay away from. even if your intentions are good, the women their attached to generally don't like it. and next time you've got two people fighting coming to you, there's nothing wrong with saying "i don't want to be caught in the middle. i think you guys should work this out on your own."
    Thank you so much for your quote you are very right its time I ve moved on so thank you

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