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jenniepepsi · Jun 17, 2009, 02:19 PM

Hello. Some of you know most of my story. But just to be clear.

I met my daughters father when I was a freshman in high school. We were together 7 years, until I gave birth to our daughter (I use the term OUR daughter losely) and he left a month later.
The last I heard from him, was when we went to court to establish child support. Back in 2003 when my daughter was about 6 months old

I have sole custody, with the right to chose when and IF I decide to let him see her. (which he has never even wanted, not once)

He paid child support for about 4 years. And has now stopped back in February. (my daughter is 5 now)

Do I need his permission to leave the state, given that I have sole custody?

this8384 · Jun 17, 2009, 02:39 PM

Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

do i need his permission to leave the state, given that i have sole custody?

Your custodial agreement should outline this. I'd double check it just to be safe.

If you really want to play it safe, send a letter to the court stating your intention. Send him a certified letter stating the same. If he wants to contest it, let him go to court - odds are he won't bother.

jenniepepsi · Jun 17, 2009, 02:41 PM

Nah I doubt very seriously that he would even care. But I want to make sure. I will have to contact the court. I don't seem to have the custody part of the paperwork anymore. Grrr. Figures. Just one more thing to work through :P lol oh well.

Thanks hon

this8384 · Jun 17, 2009, 02:50 PM

Originally Posted by jenniepepsi

nah i doubt very seriously that he would even care. but i want to make sure. i will have to contact the court. i dont seem to have the custody part of the paperwork anymore. grrr. figures. just one more thing to work thru :P lol oh well.

thanks hon

No problem. You can always get another copy of the paperwork; depending on how many pages there are, it'll probably cost $10-15.

I still say send the letter just to be safe :)

jenniepepsi · Jun 17, 2009, 02:57 PM

Hehe k :) thanks hon

rookie231 · Jun 17, 2009, 03:13 PM

By "leave the state" do you mean a visit or move?

Visit- No
Move- Even with you having Sole custody there was obviously a hearing where he was granted some custody rights. Chances are you could just go, BUT because he has been established legally as father with "rights", I would notify as he could try to use the relocation requirements (different by state) against you and cause unnecessary problems for you.

ScottGem · Jun 17, 2009, 05:38 PM

If you have sole legal custody and there is no visitation agreement, then you are free to move anywhere you want. The only time a custodial parent's ability to move may be constrained is when it would interfere with court ordered visitation. If that's not the case, then feel free to move.

What I would do is inform the court of the move and ask what would be necessary to change jurisdiction to your new location.

Fr_Chuck · Jun 17, 2009, 06:25 PM

His paying or not paying has little to do with other parts of the child custody agreement.

I see he has a "right" to see the child if you let him, so he does have some level of visits.

So if I was his attorney, I would say I did have visits rights and of course merely say you would never let me see the child.
*** can you prove no?

So since he has some visit rights, the court may rule you can't move without his permission if he would object and file a motion with them.

jenniepepsi · Jun 20, 2009, 02:18 PM

Mmm would it make a diffrence if I COULD prove that I have made her available by email on myspace? I have all of the emails saved from when she was a baby.

Also would that help if we decide to ask him to terminate his rights so that my husband can adopt her

Indianamom · Jun 20, 2009, 03:56 PM

I would think you can just go. But to be safe I would write a letter to the courts at least 30 days prior to moving. They might have a hearing but chances are he won't show up and your good to go strings unattached. Good luck.