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    Nutterz's Avatar
    Nutterz Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    Jun 16, 2009, 03:40 AM
    Moving back in?
    Hi Everyone

    Can someone please give me an idea what to do?

    I have been with my wife for 14 years and 2 children. My daughter is 6 and my son is 6months old.

    We both own a house on joint mortgage and recently I have left because of marriage breakdown and to be honest the stress of money and new born baby has taken its toll. We have been in a rut for about 2 years and looking back we have pretty much taken each other for granted.

    I have been trying to be very civil with her but I keep coming up to a brick wall. I looked after my children this weekend only to be asked if I wanted them again this coming weekend so she can go out again. I know for a fact that she has seen 2 men in the past 2 weeks but I can live with that.

    I don’t mind having them again but when I stated I will let her know, she replied “Well it is Fathers Day and if you don’t you wont see them ever again” NICE :-(

    This isn't the first time she has said this.

    I have sought legal advice and my intention is to move back in. I have tried to ask her if we can meet up and discuss things and she says NO or I’m not ready.

    What I need to ask is

    1. Can she stop me?
    2. Can she change the locks?
    3. Is this the right thing to do?

    Your advice would be most helpful

    Thanks

    Andy
    stevetcg's Avatar
    stevetcg Posts: 3,693, Reputation: 353
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #2

    Jun 16, 2009, 06:33 AM

    1) technically no, she cannot. It is your house too. I will warn you though... it wouldn't be the first time in history a spouse has lied alleging abuse to get a restraining order to have the other spouse removed.

    2) no - it is flat out illegal.

    3) If she is going out with other men, it doesn't seem as though she is truly interested in fixing the relationship. You may be causing undue stress on yourself by moving back in. As for her "you will never see them again" threat - unless she kidnaps the kids and takes them to another country, that is a total BS threat.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
    Uber Member
    		  
    #3

    Jun 16, 2009, 06:34 AM

    You say you have gone for legal advice. Then you should be going and filing for custody/visitations and whatever else you have to so that the court is the one to have the say rather than her.
    Sounds like she doesn't want anything to do with you but she can't keep the kids from you.
    You have rights.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
    		  
    #4

    Jun 16, 2009, 02:41 PM

    Your legal counsel should be answering these questions. If he's incapable of providing you answers, you need to change legal counsel.

    This is a family law question: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family-law
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