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    greeneyes23's Avatar
    greeneyes23 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 5, 2009, 04:35 PM
    Im perfect but he doesn't "feel it"? What is that?
    I was seeing this great guy for a about 3-4ish months. It was amazing! We totally clicked, had a great time together and the chemistry was awesome. In the beginning, he told me that he's slow to open up and that was fine with me; no rush. So in the last month, he stopped asking me out but kept calling me every day. I finally talked to him about it the other night. He told me that he really likes me and that I have the qualities he's been looking for and that I couldn't be more perfect... but he doesn't feel it. I never understand what this means. He's attracted to me, and I have the morales and personality traits that he wants. What the heck? My relationship baggage from my past is that this happened to me with my ex, so I heard this for years."Your perfect but I don't care and I dont' know why". So to have someone say this again is killing me. I feel like its totally me because I don't understand why this happens. Any words of wisdom? :o
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #2

    Jun 5, 2009, 07:28 PM

    Sounds like he's just letting you down easy.

    The fact that he didn't want to see you much anymore (during the last while) means that he wasn't really that interested anymore.

    Remember the good times that you had together Take it as a rejection and move on...
    mudweiser's Avatar
    mudweiser Posts: 2,750, Reputation: 707
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    #3

    Jun 5, 2009, 07:33 PM

    It sounds like he's saying "your perfect, but not for me".

    Thank your lucky stars it's at the beginning, and not 3 years down the road of a roller coaster relationship where he "figures out his feelings".

    Your not the problem- so don't start nit picking at yourself.

    Sarah
    bizygurl's Avatar
    bizygurl Posts: 522, Reputation: 110
    Senior Member
     
    #4

    Jun 5, 2009, 08:34 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by mudweiser View Post
    It sounds like he's saying "your perfect, but not for me".

    Thank your lucky stars it's at the beginning, and not 3 years down the road of a roller coaster relationship where he "figures out his feelings".

    Your not the problem- so don't start nit picking at yourself.

    Sarah
    Couldn't have put it better.:)
    mikeyd61978's Avatar
    mikeyd61978 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #5

    Jun 6, 2009, 07:47 AM

    Well maybe these men also have lots of baggage with relationships and truly are afraid to move forward because they don't think they deserve you. Low self esteem . It's probably not you. Just seems like that because coincidentally another guy has the same reason for backing away from you as the first one did. Us men have our issues . Believe me
    BlueEyes23's Avatar
    BlueEyes23 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #6

    Jun 10, 2009, 01:59 PM

    Maybe you are giving the wrong signals? There was a girl at my work who was giving off all the right signals, but when I pursued it, she got me fired for harassment. And I thought she was perfect too. I miss you Kyna, wherever you are! *cry*
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #7

    Jun 10, 2009, 03:18 PM

    Talaniman Rule- Never take rejection personally, there are always options, and opportunities, down the road, so keep it moving.
    ironclad04's Avatar
    ironclad04 Posts: 193, Reputation: 8
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    #8

    Jun 10, 2009, 04:29 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    Talaniman Rule- Never take rejection personally, there are always options, and opportunities, down the road, so keep it moving.
    ironclad04 here!! I can totally relate to this subject, because I'm one person who did somethig like this! But for me, I finally came forth and told my girl how I really felt about her and where we stood!! I mad it up to her at a creamy stand!! Now we have a 3 yr old daugter!
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #9

    Jun 10, 2009, 07:55 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by BlueEyes23 View Post
    Maybe you are giving the wrong signals? There was a girl at my work who was giving off all the right signals, but when I persued it, she got me fired for harrassment. And I thought she was perfect too. I miss you Kyna, wherever you are! *cry*
    Not the case here. You sound a little creepy and maybe you was harassing this girl Kyna and deserve to have gotten fired. I hope she has a restraining order out against you.
    makapuu's Avatar
    makapuu Posts: 304, Reputation: 63
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    #10

    Jun 14, 2009, 12:57 AM

    I think your boyfriend liked dating you because of the fun and chemistry of having a new relationship. You are perfect for somebody, but not for him. That is a compliment.
    If your history is repeating itself, then something might need to change.

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