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basketb23 · Oct 8, 2006, 06:44 PM

I took her to homecoming and we were going around but every slow dance opportunity we were there. Do you think it would be akward though for me to hold her hand before we were anything.. like from just going out for fun to holding her hand?.

beautifuldiva · Oct 8, 2006, 06:48 PM

Ummm if I may intervene... considering she doesn't know how you feel and you have really been just friends when you went out... I do think that would be a little weird... because you haven't talked to her about it yet.. that may freak her out if she's not into you like that. On the other hand she may love it if she has feelings for you too... but don't take that chance. Your best bet is to talk to her about things first before making any moves like that.

basketb23 · Oct 8, 2006, 06:58 PM

You that was my stand on it but wasn't sure haha okay good to know someone thinks same way about that too

Gillion · Oct 8, 2006, 07:00 PM

Do not ambush this girl with your physical signs of affection.

She has to give you her clear signals that she is willing to be touched.

Let her take the lead in this department. If she likes you she will flirt with you and make suggestive remarks etc.

BUT You must first let her know.

So in a face to face talk, in a nice comfortable place, over a cup of tea or coffe or ice-cream in all honesty that you are INTERESTED IN HER.

talaniman · Oct 9, 2006, 06:08 AM

She sounds as if she has a busy exciting life, do you? Backoff a bit. If she hasn't responded by now puts some time in between your next attempts at contact.(7-10) days.

LUNAGODDESS · Oct 9, 2006, 11:18 AM

When she ask you for a favor does she thanks you with a kiss? If so,. there is a possibility of a relationship there... friends offer... I pick you up for work on any day you specify... or something not so touchy... let time go and keep in touch... friends make good relationshiips... and long relationships usually last a long time because they were friends first...

momincali · Oct 9, 2006, 11:37 AM

You said you guys have been friends for a while... has she ever mentioned another guy? If she see's you like a good friend or brother, she might have already brought that up, at least once? Unless... she kind of knows already that you have feelings for her and doesn't want to say anything to hurt your feelings. I would back off a bit. Let her come looking for you for a change. She does seem to have an active life and seems to enjoy it quite a bit, try that for yourself. There's got to be stuff you do with your buddies that are just the fellas right?

She may not be reciprocating your feelings right now, but, if you make yourself less available, a little more mysterious (not too obviously though) and text or call her less, she might have a stirring of feelings and think twice about your relationship. Don't blurt your feelings out just yet. Just get busy with other things and whatever is meant to be, will fall into place in time. Like Tal said, 7-10 days ought to do it, then send her a casual "Hey what cha doin message"... Good Luck and keep us posted!

basketb23 · Oct 9, 2006, 04:06 PM

I talked to her yesterday online, and we planned a thing w/ a few of my friends and their girlfriends.. she seems cool w/ it. To answer your questino of mentioning another guy I don't think she's gone out before, and to tell you truth neither have I so that's ANOTHER reason why I have feelings for her. On Saturday my friend owes me like 10000 favors because I helped him get on his feet with the girl he's with right now so many times so I'm gnona have him bring up mine/girl's relatinoship when I "go to the bathroom" and have him like text me during the night and see what she said so I know how to play my cards for the continuatino of the evening

Gillion · Oct 9, 2006, 04:32 PM

Originally Posted by basketb23

when i "go to the bathroom" and have him like text me during the night and see what she said so i know how to play my cards for the continuatino of the evening

Dude... that is a pretty immature plan.

It is manipulative and dishonest and shows you do not have the BALLS to talk to this girl and do it yourself.

This is not how you use a wingman.

But what really will stink, is that your working with the belief that she won't be onto your bloody games.

Never delegate to another man your responsibility of being a man. i.e.

Do not send or ask another man to do what you should be doing or say what you should say or ask what you should ask.

You will never grow... but he will... at your expense.

beautifuldiva · Oct 9, 2006, 04:39 PM

Basketb23, I thought we gave you some sound advice here... What happened to calling her in a few days... setting up something to hang out or whatever and telling her yourself?

basketb23 · Oct 9, 2006, 04:43 PM

She messaged me while I was online, and it was my friends idea for all of us to hang out.. the favor thing isn't going to happen now, was just putting the idea out to see what you guys thought.. taking that back now.. aiight didn't say anything to anyone about that yet so I have nothing to worry about there

beautifuldiva · Oct 9, 2006, 04:47 PM

Lol OK good! That probably wouldn't be the best idea.. numerous things could go wrong in that situation, the most embarrassing being her finding out about that! Just wait a little longer, ask her out have fun, bring it up in a conversation and tell her what you feel... just talk to her about it. But talk to HER about it YOURSELF lol I'm sure she would appreciate that better

basketb23 · Oct 9, 2006, 04:52 PM

You. The group we going w/ sat is my friends gf's friends ( I met a few weeks ago.. cool group) + she goes to school w/ lot of them but never met them so going to introduce them so hopefully it'll be f un.. I hope she doesn't feel uncomfortable because of friend/his girlfriend and the way they act.. it can mean 2 things.. she can either see their relationship (cuz they have a fun one) as a cool one and want one too or just be upset that invited her knowing this.. I don't think she'll be upset.. their relationship was the one tha tmade get gain interest in this girl because I saw how much fun they were having lol

Gillion · Oct 9, 2006, 04:54 PM

Originally Posted by basketb23

she messaged me while i was online, and it was my friends idea for all of us to hang out.. the favor thing isn't gonna happen now, was just putting the idea out to see what you guys thought.. taking that back now ..aiight didn't say anything to anyone about that yet so i have nothing to worry about there

Do not beat yourself too hard we all make mistakes in life and that is how we learn.

talaniman · Oct 10, 2006, 07:50 AM

I talked to her yesterday online, and we planned a thing w/ a few of my friends and their girlfriends.. she seems cool w/ it. To answer your questino of mentioning another guy I don't think she's gone out before, and to tell you truth

neither have I so that's ANOTHER reason why I have feelings for her. On Saturday my friend owes me like 10000 favors because I helped him get on his feet with the girl he's with right now so many times so I'm gnona have him bring up mine/girl's relatinoship when I "go to the bathroom" and have him like text me during the night and see what she said so I know how to play my cards for the continuatino of the evening

As Gillion says, not a good idea to play games and involve everyone else. Glad you changed your mind. I would also lower expectations of how she reacts to the settings you take her too. The point is to show her a good time and have fun. Relax and just make sure she can too. Your idea to impress her with what has impressed you will surely back fire. But if you be cool and be yourself, that is what will impress her the most. Being with you and having a really good time.

basketb23 · Oct 10, 2006, 03:08 PM

"impress her with what has impressed you will surely back fire"

Nah she's met my 2 best friend and she's cool w/ them so that's not what I was trying to make a point too.. just saying what I had planned haha.. I don't plan on impressing her w/ my friends :p