[notsurenow]

Does child support have to go through the court or is there a way for mother and father of a child to agree on support? Imagine there is no divorce and so there have been no court proceedings.

If mother and father agree on out of court support, what is the best way for the non-custodial parent to prove support every month in case it eventually ends up in court? Is proof of payment good enough? Or does there need to be something written from the custodial parent every month?

Thanks.

[nikosmom]

You two can agree on an amount you just have to make sure that all your bases are covered in the even that the Custodial parent decides at some point to file a formal order with the courts. Also realize that you may be setting yourself up if you lowball the amount.

The best way is to keep accurate records; a paper trail. Write checks instead of cash and then keep the voided checks. That way you have documentation of what you've paid.

I have to ask is there any particular reason that you prefer to handle the support without the court's assistance?

[ScottGem]

Especially if there is no divorce involved, then there is nothing stopping the parents from drawing up their own agreement for custody, support and visitation.

One caveat is to put EVERYTHING in writing. As niko said, keep copies of all cancelled checks or money order receipts FOREVER!

But any settlement outside of court will probably not be enforceable by a court. What happens if the NCP stops paying? What happens if the CP gets into a snit and decides not to allow visitation? What happens if the CP decides to remarry someone who lives in another state?

Having everything done by court order protects both parties and the child.

[notsurenow]

So long as both parties are fine with it and the NCP continues to pay the CP then there shouldn't be an issue, correct?

Also, does there need to be any other records kept aside from canceled checks? Will the court consider money given outside of a court order as a gift or is it a gift only if it's money given to the CP when there is an active support order?

What kind of amount should be agreed upon?

[ScottGem]

Different states have laws about the amount, you need to research the law for your area. Generally anything paid over an above the agreed upon support is a gift.

Everything may be amicable now, but the odds are they won't be amicable forever.