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    starrordshire's Avatar
    starrordshire Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 23, 2009, 02:10 PM
    Commonlaw relationship
    I started seeing a man that is in a common law relationship with another woman who I know. I thought I would be O.K. with the situation, and I was at first but now I'm starting to have second thoughts and feel uncomfortable with the whole thing. How do I tell him that I Don't want to stay in this relationship but remain friends?
    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
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    #2

    Apr 23, 2009, 02:32 PM

    Only certain states recognize common law relationships.

    If you are wanting to break the relationship, then I don't recommend friendship. You are apparently comfortable enough sleeping with this gentlemen, so you should feel comfortable sitting down with him telling him that you no longer want your relationship with him.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #3

    Apr 23, 2009, 05:32 PM

    Never get involve with a man that is already involve with someone.

    With that being said, all you have to do is tell him you don't want to be involve with him anymore because you feel uneasy about the whole situation. You don't like sharing and you don't like being second. If you are okay with being friends, just friends, nothing more. Then you can accept his friendship.

    However, if I was you I would move on. Tell him it's over and he would never hear from me again.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #4

    Apr 23, 2009, 05:38 PM

    What you are basically saying is that you are dating a man who is living with another women,

    So you are "the other women" he is cheating on her with you.

    Not sure why you would want to be in that.
    nikosmom's Avatar
    nikosmom Posts: 1,611, Reputation: 488
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    #5

    Apr 23, 2009, 05:56 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by starrordshire View Post
    How do I tell him that I Don't want to stay in this relationship but remain friends?
    You tell him how you feel; that's how you do it.

    You don't owe him an explanation because umm, he's in a relationship with another woman.

    You shouldn't try to remain friends because well, he doesn't seem like a friend. He's used you and hurt you. That's not what my friends do to me.

    Bottom line: He is involved with someone else and therefore not available to you.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
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    #6

    Apr 24, 2009, 11:38 AM

    It's not only up to you to keep a friendship. A friendship requires two people. You can't say or do anything to force him to be your friend.

    What you can do is be honest with him. Tell him how you feel. Tell him that you no longer want to be in a relationship, but that you want to remain friends. It's up to him to decide what he wants.
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