[theresbeautyinu]

I don't know myself anymore. One minute ill be totally lost and out of it, then the next ill be happy and outgoing. Then ill be like terrified. Sometimes I feel like just letting go, I've hurt myself allot, and like... sometimes I just want to be gone... I don't understand myself or my feelings... I need someone who understands this feeling and has been there... please tell me how to understand myself better?

[lighterrr]

Been there before but I always seem to bounce back, with the help of some anti psychotic/depression medications. Have you spoken to a doctor about these feeling? Are you currently on any medications?

I am not a doctor but how long have you been having these feelings? Has something traumatic happened to you recently to bring on these mood swings? It could be signs of manic depression, one minute your high then another minute your low, but manic depression can also have long term rotations where you could be happy or sad for many years then flip to the opposite.

You should definitely speak to a doctor about these feelings, if they are becoming to overwhelming and by the sounds of your post they may be you definitely need an intervention and quick. Local hospitals usually have outpatient groups for people suffering from mental illness, that's in Canada thought. Where about are you located.

[theresbeautyinu]

I'm in the united state... and I'm only thirteen... I'm not ready for medication... and it was hard for me just to post that, let alone talk to other people... I've had these feelings for about half a year and when they started, I was getting in allot of fights with friends... but they've gotten worse this week because of my best friend leaving me... but I'm not ready to see a doctor or medication or to even really talk about it... I'm so scared.

[lighterrr]

Oh my you are very young. Do you have a parent that you feel comforteble discussing theses feelings with, or even a close family member that's an adult? You are very young and you do need help to deal with these emotions that you are feeling. You parent(s) would not be happy that you are dealing with this on your own I am sure they would want to help you.

I have provided some links to some sites that deal with teens and adolescents who are having emotional issues.

Keep posting on this board there are many caring people on this forum that would love to be of any help they can be to you.

Good luck hun, help is out their, go get it and don't suffer through this by yourself.

https://form.troubled-teen-advisor.com

The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry

Missing Page | American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry

202.966.7300

I am sure they be able to help you find self help groups in your area where you are among your peers.

[theresbeautyinu]

I'm afraid to tell my parents... everything I've told them before they twist it and tell other people, and I don't like that, my parents never understand me... I've told a close friend... and spending time with her and talking to her helps allot, but she's always so busy. =(

[lighterrr]

Would you be comfortable joining a support group that's close to your home and where you will be with other 13 year olds talking about your feelings?

Click on the second like I gave to you it will lead you to a form where you can fill out the information to find support in your region of the country.

I am sorry that you can t talk to your folks though. Maybe you can explain to them that you want to talk to them, but you don't like it when they tell everybody everything that you discuss with them.

[theresbeautyinu]

I'm to scared to talk to anyone... when it comes to telling people I explain to myself that I'm okay and ill be fine... but then a few days to a week later I get depressed more. I'm just SO afraid to talk about it... it's the scariest thing ever!!

[Winsor Newton]

Maybe you've heard this before, but I'm a big advocate of writing stuff down. I do this for two reasons: (1) To try and un-bottle the stuff I've been keeping inside me, to try and get it out even just a bit and see it on paper (2) So I can look at what I've written and ask myself some questions.

Just today I did this at work, no lie. One of the things I wrote was "I feel like I have no control over my future" among other things. When I'm done spilling all my worries and fears out I then rephrase it all into answerable questions. So that phrase became "What would make me feel like I have control over my future?" Now I have something that I can answer and maybe solve a problem. Personally, my answer was, "I need to be better at my job and in more control of when and where I get employed so I can plan for and do the things I want to do."

I feel bad dumping on people so I do things like this to try and understand myself a little more. A big question I ask is "What do I want to make myself happy with myself?" Sometimes it's vain, like I'd want to be 'known' for something. Other time it's silly "I'd like to be able to draw a comic", but whatever it is I think I'm learning a bit more about myself and that makes me happy.

Be honest with yourself. Don't be ashamed of what you're feeling no matter what it is. It's like talking to yourself, it's useful, and it's totally different than the crazies you see on the street =]

[theresbeautyinu]

hmm... thanks, I haven't tried nor heard it like that before, I've heard it other ways, but not that way... =)

[Casey56]

Most people feel like this sometimes, no one understands themselves, no one can understand life, you are what you are, life is what it is. We all go through a lot of emotions have have ups and downs and twists and turns, but that's the road of life, its not straight its all bendy and twisty, there's choices to make, but remember its YOUR life, don't let ANYONE influence ANYTHING that you do, live your life how you want to, I don't understand myself either, I don't think anyone does, but I although we don't understnd ourselves we should love ourselves, or who we are, and we should love our friends and family, but remember you will loose people sometimes, I was like this when my mum and dad divorced, I felt lost and then id be happy and outgoing at school, explain your feelings to someone that will understand, a best friend, and it will make you feel better to have it out of you, don't trap all your secrets up inside you, they'll just get worse and worse and worse until you feel so bad about yourself and your life that you'll do something really stupid, I know how it feels, don't get to this point, love yourself, love your family, love your life, there's no point in trying to understand yourself because you never will, just feel how you feel and don't worry about why, there's no point in trying to understand life because you never will, just live your life, how you want to, and love the life you have and be grateful for it, whenever I feel sad I think of the people somewhere else that are grateful for their life and I feel like I should be grateful too, don't be sad, every 60 seconds of anger or upset is a minute of happiness that you will never get back.
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I am just a thirteen year old girl, and I thought of that myself, I hope it helps, and if it doesn't, I am sorry.. :)

[Casey56]

It is hard to talk it through with people, but you have to try. And if you cry, you cry. Its hard, lifes hard, but its worth it, always remember life is worth it :)