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    jenoveeve's Avatar
    jenoveeve Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 18, 2009, 12:21 PM
    I need a way out of this marriage!
    I'm a mother of three, trapped in an abusive relationship by being at home with my children for the past years. I have no money, I can't find a job, I have no family, and nowhere to go. I'm desperate for relief! He knows he can go to jail if he hits me, so he beats me verbally. He's even started spitting on me! OFTEN! He lies to his family and makes them think that I'm the problem. I am soooo passive! I get along with EVERYONE<not an exageration! I'm in tears constantly! I started college last year, but I still have two years to go. I've been searching for a job for months now, but no one is hiring because of this crazey economy. What can I do? I'm scared of losing my kids, and I know that he and his family will stop at nothing to do so. PLEASE HELP IN ANY WAY!!
    artlady's Avatar
    artlady Posts: 4,208, Reputation: 1477
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Apr 18, 2009, 12:28 PM

    You need to get out as soon as possible.This type of abuse will only escalate to physical abuse.

    I am giving you a link to the domestic violence website.From there you can find a safe place to stay with your children in your area.

    They will give you the tools and the means to gain safety and independence from your abuser.

    You have to be strong enough to make the change happen.You CAN have a different life.There is HELP out there.

    National Domestic Violence Hotline
    nitelight198073's Avatar
    nitelight198073 Posts: 470, Reputation: 76
    Full Member
     
    #3

    Apr 18, 2009, 07:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by artlady View Post
    You need to get out as soon as possible.This type of abuse will only escalate to physical abuse.

    I am giving you a link to the domestic violence website.From there you can find a safe place to stay with your children in your area.

    They will give you the tools and the means to gain safety and independence from your abuser.

    You have to be strong enough to make the change happen.You CAN have a different life.There is HELP out there.

    National Domestic Violence Hotline
    You are so right artlady had to spread rep
    mudweiser's Avatar
    mudweiser Posts: 2,750, Reputation: 707
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Apr 18, 2009, 07:51 PM

    If you are in Canada you can apply for emergency assistance. They will relocate you to a women's shelter shortly and find you a place, you will be on social assistance but they will help you find a job, get some training and help you move on with your life.

    Please call a social services!

    I am unsure if the USA has the same programs as Canada but I know they have shelters- please seek one immediately.

    Sarah
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
    Expert
     
    #5

    Apr 18, 2009, 08:13 PM

    There are shelters for women with Children almost everywhere. Time to find them
    foxxxyreddd's Avatar
    foxxxyreddd Posts: 3, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #6

    Apr 20, 2009, 05:57 AM
    If you had a place to go and money to survive off would you leave?

    If th answer to this is yes then you should seek a shelter for you and your children. This means look into the phone book or online in your area and see what shelters are available. For as a job you can do nanny work, you can work two small jobs to make ends meet for you and your kids until you finish school. Such as fast food places, house cleaning, etc.

    And do not tell him these plans because he will try to hurt you and your kids. So when you leave do not let him know.

    If these are his kids also you have to think about their safety. THey may be safer without him in their life.

    Also pray to god to see you through this. TO give you strength. THis is something you have to commit to doing. If you do not leave him for your sake. DO it for your kids sake.

    In short, seek a shelter, find a fast food job( 2 if you have too) or nanny job, to support you and your kids. THe shelter people will also help you find a home for your family. Don't let him know about your plans to leave, he may hurt you and your kids. Don't give up. Don't give up. Life is hard but pray to god to make you stronger.

    Remember that he may try to find you after you leave so protect yourself from him even if it calls for you to take a defense class to defend yourself.

    First and foremost get out the house , seek shelter, find minium wage job( two if you have too). You have to be 5 steps a head of this guy. THink like an FBI person to keep yourself from becoming the victim here. I know you watch CSI, law and order, cold case files.

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