[tcollum2001]

Me and my daughter's mother were never married. My name is on the birth certificate. Her mother and I are gay. We have a verbal 50/50 (four days on, four days off) custody agreement that has been in place for all 5 years of my daughter's life. We share financial responsibility equally. My daughter's mother has been physically abused by her current partner on three separate occasions over the past three years and the last time my daughter was at their house. My daughter was not witness to the abuse, however she was aware that her mom and partner got into a fight and that's why the police were called. I do not want to keep my daughter from her mother, however I want to prevent my daughter from any further mental or potentially physical harm. Is there a legal way for me to prevent my daughter's mother from allowing my daughter to be around her abusive partner?

I'd appreciate the advice.

Thanks

[stevetcg]

Pardon the abrupt question but are you male or female? I do not want to assume anything here.

The problem I see is that I am not sure if you are the legal parent of the child or not, and that will make all the difference in the world on this one.

[JudyKayTee]

This whole arrangement (support, custody, visitation) should go through the Court system. This will be one of the custody/visitation issues.

Without a Court Order you are pretty much flying by the seat of your pants (so to speak).

To protect your child you need to put it in writing in a form approved by the Court.

[tcollum2001]

I'm am the biological father of my child ad I'm just afraid this cycle of abuse my daughter's mother is in won't stop and that it may involve my child if I don't take some steps. The problem is that I don't know if there exists an order that states "Mom and Dad, you have equal visitation rights, equal finicail responsibility, and this child cannot be in the same house as so-and-so."

[JudyKayTee]

I'm am the biological father of my child ad I'm just afraid this cycle of abuse my daughter's mother is in won't stop and that it may involve my child if I don't take some steps. The problem is that I don't know if there exists an order that states "Mom and Dad, you have equal visitation rights, equal finicail responsibility, and this child cannot be in the same house as so-and-so."

The only way to know if there's an Order is to file for your own Order - at this point it appears you have no legal rights because you are not the acknowledged father. You need to get those rights.

Obviously if you are the father all other Orders will be moot.

[ScottGem]

As noted, you really need to fomalize this.

But I understand your question and I'm not sure if you can dictate that the mother cannot be with her partner when the daughter is around. I strongly suggest consulting a local Family Law attorney.