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Jessica88 · Apr 5, 2009, 10:50 AM

About a year ago I moved to a different state to go to school. I left a serious relationship and we tried to do long distance, but it didn't work out in the end. I haven't had another relationship since then and recently he just got into a relationship with someone else. In the back of my mind I know that I do not want to marry this person and cannot picture myself with him in the long run, but I still think about him and miss him. I am moving back to my old state where he is. We have the same group of close friends and I have ran through my head the different scenarios of how I am going to handle seeing him. I just want to know why it's taking me so long to get over him? Is it because I haven't had anything since? How am I going to handle hanging out with our friends and seeing him and his new girlfriend together? Should I just ignore him?

I wish · Apr 6, 2009, 08:13 AM

Sounds like the no contact rule applies: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...qs-332732.html

He obviously moved on with his life so now it's your turn. It's better if you do not contact him until you heal.

Even if you do meet another guy now, it will be a rebound, so I'm not sure if that would have an effect on getting over him.

You say that you moved away for 1 year, but you guys tried long distance for a while. So how long did you guys actually break up for?

Jessica88 · Apr 6, 2009, 09:32 AM

We broke up around this time last year. I wouldn't voluntarily contact him when I go home. I just wonder how he is going to act around me when we see each other and if it's even possible to be friends with him when he has a girlfriend. And the problem is that I am going to see him often because we have the same group of friends.

I wish · Apr 6, 2009, 09:41 AM

Originally Posted by Jessica88

We broke up around this time last year. I wouldn't voluntarily contact him when I go home. I just wonder how he is going to act around me when we see each other and if it's even possible to be friends with him when he has a girlfriend. And the problem is that I am going to see him often because we have the same group of friends.

In that case, take it one step at the time. See what's it like the first time you see him again and go from there.

You do have a choice, you could meet in him alone first to let out anything on your chest or simply to see what it's like to see him again, so that it would be less awkward around your friend, but I'm not sure how his current girlfriend would feel about that.

Either way, take it 1 step at the time. If you are thinking too much, it would just cause unnecessary tension. Go with the flow...