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missyds8 · Apr 2, 2009, 08:29 AM

Originally Posted by stevetcg

I understand that you dont want him to have visitation, but that is not for you to decide. It is up to the court and if he files for paternity and visitation and its approved, you are obligated to comply or go to jail.

I get that you want what is best for your child, but you are skirting a fine line between legal and illegal and I would strongly recommend speaking to a local lawyer and getting to the bottom of what you can and cannot do.

Your not answering what I want, Ok so if he filed for a paturnity test, and there was a court date how come I was not aware of it?? Don't you have to sign something saying you received your summoning to court? He is claiming he filed and I missed court and that if I miss the next one the court will put a warrant out for my arrest. I think he is lying, do you?

this8384 · Apr 2, 2009, 08:33 AM

Originally Posted by missyds8

your not answering what I want, Ok so if he filed for a paturnity test, and there was a court date how come i was not aware of it??? don't you have to sign something saying you received your summoning to court? he is claiming he filed and I missed court and that if I miss the next one the court will put a warrent out for my arrest. I think he is lying, do you?

You apparently didn't read this answer:

Originally Posted by califdadof3

If he followed the rules and sent a certified letter to your last known address and then later published the notice in the newspaper then he could very well have an action against you.

Not all states require that you "sign" something when you're served; my state - WI - allows for publication in a newspaper to be considered proof of service.

Your best bet is to call your county courthouse and see if he actually has filed anything.

And yes, you can be held in contempt if he DID file and you do not show up for court.

Justwantfair · Apr 2, 2009, 08:35 AM

He didn't know where you were.

Yes, he can file to your last known address or run an ad, when he can't locate you, then a rule to show cause can be issued, if you still don't show they can issue a warrant for your arrest.

You don't get to just disappear just because you have decided that the father isn't going to have rights. It's unlawful. They will do what they can to locate you and the child and they won't be happy you were hiding!

this8384 · Apr 2, 2009, 08:37 AM

I'm confused by your postings.

First, you're the mother of a child whose father is claiming he wants a paternity test.

Then, you're asking for a friend who happens to be in the same situation.

Which one is it? Are you the mother or are you the friend?

Also, no "boyfriend" adopted the baby. There was no legal adoption if the biological father didn't consent to it.

this8384 · Apr 2, 2009, 08:38 AM

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

He didn't know where you were.

Yes, he can file to your last known address or run an ad, when he can't locate you, then a rule to show cause can be issued, if you still don't show they can issue a warrant for your arrest.

You don't get to just disappear just because you have decided that the father isn't going to have rights. It's unlawful. They will do what they can to locate you and the child and they won't be happy you were hiding!

Read the other threads started by this user... it gets interesting.

stevetcg · Apr 2, 2009, 08:39 AM

Originally Posted by missyds8

your not answering what I want, Ok so if he filed for a paturnity test, and there was a court date how come i was not aware of it??? don't you have to sign something saying you received your summoning to court? he is claiming he filed and I missed court and that if I miss the next one the court will put a warrent out for my arrest. I think he is lying, do you?

Im sorry that I wasn't answering your question. It had already been accurately answered so I didn't feel the need to reiterate it, but to bring up another point.

I do not know if he is lying or not. Its possible, of course, but I wouldn't bet my freedom and my child on it. Call the court and ask.

What he IS NOT lying about is that they will issue a warrant. If you want to avoid the problem, have your person in contact with him accept legal service of papers for you.

My point in all of this: you cannot just hide your child from him. That is illegal.

this8384 · Apr 2, 2009, 08:39 AM

Soooo... there is a support order without a paternity test ever having been done and without the biological father's name being on the birth certificate?
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/family...ng-336729.html

I do believe I've heard everything now...

Justwantfair · Apr 2, 2009, 08:41 AM

Originally Posted by missyds8

the child is 4.5 years old, it was no fast acting idea, they decided it then so the child would have his name when school started.

The child that was 4 months. Old at the beginning of the month is now 4 1/2 years old?

this8384 · Apr 2, 2009, 08:41 AM

Go read the other threads, steve... I think we've been trolled.

this8384 · Apr 2, 2009, 08:42 AM

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

The child that was 4 mos. old at the begining of the month is now 4 1/2 years old?

Duh, didn't you see the movie "Jack" with Robin Williams? :p

Justwantfair · Apr 2, 2009, 08:46 AM

I don't think that there is a support order.

I believe that the OP believes that the man she has been hiding her child from should be paying support out of the goodness of his heart.

She doubtfully ever had an order entered through the court system.

stevetcg · Apr 2, 2009, 08:48 AM

Originally Posted by this8384

Go read the other threads, steve....I think we've been trolled.

Looks like it, yes.

Missy, tell us the whole, no BS situation or none of the answers provided are going to actually apply.

twinkiedooter · Apr 2, 2009, 09:35 AM

Originally Posted by this8384

Go read the other threads, steve....I think we've been trolled.

I read all the other threads. Very interesting in that this troll thinks she can switch facts around.

There is no way a "boyfriend" could adopt a child. The prospective parents have to be married in order for the Judge to approve this. Right there is a big fat fib on her part.

The pay child support is messed up as well.

This, my dear, you are getting quite good at troll hunting. You have to get in line to get your Troll Catcher T Shirt award shortly...

Curlyben · Apr 2, 2009, 10:30 AM

>Multiple Threads Merged<
As this is getting too confusing for people to follow as the facts keep changing.

9110024 · Apr 2, 2009, 05:02 PM

Yes you do need to take full custody. He does not need to be around our bady in his present state. He could hurt your child. Do not let him anywhere near you or your child.

missyds8 · Apr 2, 2009, 05:35 PM

First of all people, I am the one with the 4 month old, and yes my friend has a similar situation, I met her because of her situation, and NO I AM NOT HIDING, he knows I live in PA and he knows my parents address the address I lived at before I moved. When I staerted getting answers I told my friend about it and she asked to to ask. So all of you stuck up people can get the thought out of your head, and my sister, the father of her baby didn't care and yes her boyfriend can adopt when there Isn't NO FATHER on the birth certificte. He did so obiviously its possible. Thanks for being so damn rude to me, I am going through a bad situation and was just looking for advice, but guess this site is a fake for people who just THINK they know it all.

stevetcg · Apr 2, 2009, 05:43 PM

Originally Posted by missyds8

first of all people, I am the one with the 4 month old, and yes my friend has a similar situation, i met her because of her situation, and NO I AM NOT HIDING, he knows I live in PA and he knows my parents address the address I lived at before I moved. When i staerted getting answers I told my friend about it and she asked to to ask. So all of you stuck up people can get the thought out of your head, and my sister, the father of her baby didn't care and yes her boyfriend can adopt when there AINT NO FATHER on the birth certificte. He did so obiviously its possible. thanks for being so damn rude to me, I am going thru a bad situation and was just looking for advice, but guess this site is a fake for people who just THINK they know it all.

And we see the true colors.

JudyKayTee · Apr 2, 2009, 06:35 PM

Originally Posted by missyds8

first of all people, I am the one with the 4 month old, and yes my friend has a similar situation, i met her because of her situation, and NO I AM NOT HIDING, he knows I live in PA and he knows my parents address the address I lived at before I moved. When i staerted getting answers I told my friend about it and she asked to to ask. So all of you stuck up people can get the thought out of your head, and my sister, the father of her baby didn't care and yes her boyfriend can adopt when there AINT NO FATHER on the birth certificte. He did so obiviously its possible. thanks for being so damn rude to me, I am going thru a bad situation and was just looking for advice, but guess this site is a fake for people who just THINK they know it all.

And now all of the questions have been answered - very clearly, in fact.

Apparently the stuck up people are those who can spell, speak in full sentences, have education and experience in law, don't resort to swearing and maintain their cool. They also don't get themselves into these situations and then tear into people who are trying to help.

Oh, and they are consistent in their posts.

Another "person" entitled.

ScottGem · Apr 2, 2009, 06:49 PM

Originally Posted by missyds8

and yes her boyfriend can adopt when there AINT NO FATHER on the birth certificte. He did so obiviously its possible.

Before an adoption can happen the bio parents have to agree to it. If no father is listed a good faith attempt to contact possible fathers needs to be made. Most states will not allow an adoption if there is not a legal or longterm commitment between the parents. So I have to doubt your sister's boyfrend was able to legally adopt her child.

Originally Posted by missyds8

thanks for being so damn rude to me, I am going thru a bad situation and was just looking for advice, but guess this site is a fake for people who just THINK they know it all.

There were two ways you could have reacted to responses you received. You could have aplogized for the misunderstanings cause by posting multiple threads with misleading stories. Or you could have lashed out and attacked the people who tried to help you. You chose the latter which just affirmed the opinion people had formed about you.

9110024 · Apr 2, 2009, 07:24 PM

Originally Posted by missyds8

I am protecting the child. he is a high drug user, abusive, has been to prison for selling guns illegally, been to rehab more then once, works under the table jobs, like construction and selling drugs. I dont even want him to have any visitation not even supervised. and before i moved he didn't want anything to do with the baby, and I have a letter from him telling me that, and when he found out I moved all of a sudden he wants to know where I am and wants to be the father.

I agree you are not hiding your child from him you are portecting your child. If I were in your situation I would do the same thing.