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jmw0713 · Mar 31, 2009, 12:37 PM

Usually when someone doesn't reply, it means they are not interested. If it takes them a long time to reply, they are not as interested in you as you think they are.

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 01:08 PM

Thank you this is exactly why I came here to ask. I took a step back to read what everyone has said. I don't want to say any of the input here is right or wrong. It is all insightful. Sometimes love is blind.

If you counted the hours we've spent together I think you might understand.

When I initially came back from the break the relationship was very strong. It was for a few months up until she had returned from vacation. Now she seems to be more interested in something else I can't put my finger on.

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 01:13 PM

She has never lied to me once from the best I can tell. She doesn't believe in leading people on or cheating in a relationship. We have both had relationships in the past where we were cheated on. I am pretty sure she would tell me if something is up in that category. She logs on everyday and initially messages me first. I don't try to crowed her. Only she just doesn't seem to have time to talk.

She ignores a lot of small chatter now. If I decide to go to bed though she is usually pretty to respond tell me she loves and wishes a good night.

Its very confusing to me. I have read a lot of articles on behavior of women and I think its safe to say no man or women knows exactly what they want.

We do still show interest for each other. Its just much harder to get the same kind of responses that should we just easily divulge on

jmw0713 · Mar 31, 2009, 02:31 PM

If she is ignoring you, and not responding right away, she could also be talking with other people as well. Its very easy to hide things on the internet.

JustHisGirl · Mar 31, 2009, 03:20 PM

OK I'm not going to tell you that online relationships don't work. I met my boyfriend online. We lived 14 hours apart. I now live with him. But the girl your talking to is over seas. One of you is going to have to be willing to leave everything you know behind. I can promise you that is not easy. I honestly believe you can not know if someone is perfect for you unless you are around them. People are a lot different in person that just on the phone or online. I wish you luck in your relationship but its not going to be easy. Especially when its time for you two to live together. Are you willing to move overseas away from your family for a girl?

JustHisGirl · Mar 31, 2009, 03:32 PM

And I didn't read all of your post before. There is no reason for you to stop talking to her, there is nothing wrong with you two just being friends. But I don't think you should expect to spend the rest of your life with her without thinking about everything first. I don't know why she isn't talking to you as much as before. It really could be anything, maybe she realized what I'm trying to tell you and wants to make herself back off so it doesn't get too serious.

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 03:42 PM

We have decided that I will be the one who will be going to visit first. She is currently trying to save for school which is going to be expensive. We have also decided that we will move to a different country together. She doesn't particularly like where she is located.

I guess maybe just back off a bit. I think the comments about being premature are probably correct. Even though we have spent so many hours together and it feels like the right thing. We really don't know our chemistry.

I love this girl I know it's love. I'm just worried I have been blinded by it.

The conversation about kids was an accident we shared similar ideas it just connected. I don't feel that I have rushed it although perhaps I have.

JustHisGirl · Mar 31, 2009, 03:50 PM

You don't want to move to a different country where you don't know anyone. I don't doubt that you love her. Its entirely possible, but I think you should talk to her and find out what she wants. I really think you should just tell her you think it would be best if you two just remained friends.

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 03:53 PM

The thought of just being friends with her makes lip stiff. I really see us as more. I'm going to try to talk to her about it tonight. I appreciate all the angles on the topic.

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 03:56 PM

She also says that she loves the way I talk to her. No one else has treated her as well as I have. But she is so quiet I jush wish I could be in her shoes for day.

JustHisGirl · Mar 31, 2009, 03:59 PM

I understand I really do. I've sort of been in this situation before. But I don't think you will be as happy as you think you will if you move that far away from your family. By the way how old are you

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 04:02 PM

We are both in our mid twenties. Still lots of time to grow.

I just really appreciate everything about this girl. I want to do what's in our best interest.

As well. I grew up in alone pretty much. My parents divorced and my mom worked 3-11 and my siblings had moved out. I am pretty sure I can accept the sacrifice of being close to my family. It's not something I have ever had really. But that is much longer and much different story.

JustHisGirl · Mar 31, 2009, 04:05 PM

My home life sucked. I hated being there, I was pretty upset everyday. I just was not happy at all. So I decided to move all the way to New York from South Carolina to be with my boyfriend because he made me happy and I needed that. But everyday I miss my home, I miss my family. I don't understand what I miss, but I do miss them a lot. And its really hard every time I leave them, because I can't stand to watch them cry.

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 04:11 PM

But you went and lived BF, how long did you talk prior before you knew it's what you wanted to do.

Out of all the things I can miss I miss my childhood with my father. Something I didn't have and can't reacreate. Only to be there for my children so they don't have to live with the same ordeals and trials.

I think about this girl everyday when I wake up and every night before I go to sleep. There is never a day where I am not thinking about her the better half of it.

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 04:15 PM

Its pretty sad when the best childhood memory you have is crying on your dads shoulder because you didn't want to go back home after christmas. I missed the best things in my life.

I don't want to miss this girl too. She has projected herself as everything I have ever wanted in a girl. We both want to know each other on a personal level, or she claims. But lately its been like I am no longer part of her day.

JustHisGirl · Mar 31, 2009, 04:19 PM

I knew my boyfriend for over 2 years before I moved in with him. It was almost 2 years when I decided that's what I wanted to do. If it had been overseas I couldn't have done it. I'm sure people do it. I'm not going to tell you what to do. I'm just telling you what I think.

Whywesuck · Mar 31, 2009, 04:23 PM

I know that you aren't trying to tell me what to do. I really appreciate everyone who comes here and adds their input to the topic. No 2 people think the same there for the same answer may not reflect or work as well with others. I came here for advice not for the answer. And I am thankful for anyone who has added their input.